How to bring back your ex girlfriend

Relationships often end in a whirlwind of doubt and bitter accusation. You probably said a few things you didnt mean, and she fought back. Now that youve had a little bit of time to think about whats been lost, you know you want her back. Heres how to do that. 

Steps

Part 1: Get Your Life Back Together

1. Get your life back on track. So youve been in a relationship for some time, and maybe your girlfriend has just broken it off. Its a sad and lonely time for you right now, but focus on the things you can change about yourself before you move back on to her.

• Girls want to see self-improvement from guys. Maybe your girlfriend complained about something you did while you two were in your relationship. Maybe theres something that you know you can improve simply because it will make you a better person. Well, nows the time to strike. Cut your video game playing down to a reasonable time, if thats what she wants, or start wearing cleaner clothes when youre around her. If you focus on being a better person while apart, you can go back to her with the "evidence" that youre a new guy.

• Recover emotionally. You dont stand a chance of getting your ex back if youre not emotionally calm and controlled. Women dislike needy, clingy, desperate men - so you need to pull your own life together before attempting to draw her back into it. Like it or not, showing her that you can deal with life on your own will attract her back to you. Thats because girls like men who are self-sufficient and independent. So go out to the gym, visit the movies with friends, or start an adventure. If youre having a great time, shell want to be there with you.

• Get some new clothes. New times call for new duds. Its a subtle change in you, but the importance will be clear to her: your new outer shell will signal deeper changes underneath. Get that new shirt that youve been wanting to buy, or those new pair of jeans. Looking sharp is an important aspect of physical attraction, and if she sees you looking great in unfamiliar clothes, shell sense that theres been forward movement, if not wholesale change.

2. Get the right attitude. Getting your ex-girlfriend back starts with finding the right attitude. Girls, for the most part, want to see mature, independent guys who like to have fun and know what theyre good at. We know thats a lot to work, so start small if youre feeling overwhelmed.

• Stop being jealous. Being jealous will get you nowhere. Jealousy is associated with fear and anxiety, two unattractive traits to have. Plus, what youre non-verbally telling her is that you want to control her. No one wants to be controlled. So learn to fight your jealousy if you can, and focus on being non-threatening. Youll get more bees with honey than you will with vinegar.

• Act like nothing is wrong. Even if your guts are tumbling like clothes in a washing machine, try not to let her know. Shes probably not going to want you back if youre acting depressed, mopey, or sulky. Make sure youre laughingand genuinely trying to have a good time. You might find that youve become a happier person along the way. If you are feeling depressed, surround yourself with friends or family. Dont wait alone in a corner and just hope for her to come back to you.

• Develop a playful sense of humor. What do girls say they look for most in guys? A sense of humor and a playful attitude. These two traits are attractive because they tell other people that were youthful and not aggressive. So learn a few jokes if you can (friends are always good to try them out on) and keep the ones that work and throw away the ones that dont. Learn to make fun of yourself a little, in a confident way — not a mopey way. And, for goodness sake, be playful, especially when youre around her. Tease her lovingly, or play a small prank on a friend. Youll notice the difference in her.

Part 2: Set The Stage

1. Leave her alone. At least for a little while, give her some time to think about the relationship. If you had a great relationship, shell think about all the good things that you did for her and feel the absence of you in her life.

• Cut off all communication. Maybe you dont talk to her for a couple weeks, or perhaps a month. This is tough and it will hurt, but really its killing her more. This will also let your tempers cool down if things were heating right when you broke up.

• You need to give her space for three reasons: 1) People simply need space; if you cant give her any space, maybe thats something you can work on to show her that youve changed. 2) Shell get an opportunity to realize how good you are; not that she doesnt know this already, but she may not feel it in her bones. 3) Youll show her how independent you are on your own; the "rebel" is so attractive to women because hes totally on his own and doesnt need other people.

 2. Start talking to another girl. Dont do anything with her, but strike up a friendship. You want to raise your own stock by showing her that other girls like you and are attracted to you.

• Dont get this step confused with pursuing another girl. You want to hang out and talk, do fun things together, but not hook up. If you hook up with another girl, your chances of getting back together with your ex are greatly diminished.

• Go out with a group of girls. Show your ex that attentive girls like being around you. These girls will be your wing-women. If you can pull together a big group of popular, intelligent, smart girls, chances are your ex is going to feel more interested, maybe without even noticing it.

3. Tap your inner alpha male. The alpha male, in nature, is the male in a group of primates that has the highest rank, and gets his pick of the females. 

• Most girls are attracted to the alpha male for deep biological reasons: They believe he can provide for them better, protect them better, and give her biologically fit children. Even if you dont think that alpha males are your exs type, subtle changes might work on her: pump out your chest a bit, make an effort to work out your arms and thighs, and project strength.

Part 3: Make The Move

1. Give her an apology. Whether you broke up with her, or she broke up with you, an apology is almost always in order. An apology shows her that youre capable of swallowing your ego, and that you care enough to tell her you were wrong. If done correctly, an apology will work wonders.

• Send her flowers. Girls love flowers, for reasons men still dont know. They die after a week, and they just sit around gathering dust. Well, odds are your ex probably loves them, because they smell pretty and look good and she gets to show them to her friend and brag about how much someone cares for her. You want to be that someone.

• Send her a letter. Girls also love letters, because they take a lot of time and you have to express your feelings. Start off by saying something like: "I know this letter doesnt fix whats broken between us, and maybe it never will. But I want you to know that I care deeply about you, and I always will. That part has never changed. The part thats changed is that I realize how stupid I was to let you go."

• Tell her in person. Set a time to meet in a public place, or a place that you know shell feel comfortable in. When the time is right, say: "I know I made some mistakes during our relationship, and I wanted to take full responsibility for those. I shouldnt have done [whatever it is you did] to you, and I feel horrible now. But the biggest mistake I made was losing you. I dont expect anything from you, I just want you to know that."

2. Slowly work up to friendship. Maybe some trust was broken in your relationship, and now its time for you to start repairing it. Trust for girls is a big thing. You want to show her that she can trust you again, that you are worthy of her trust.

• Do something nice for her without expecting her to pay you back. If shes studying late for an exam, pop by with her favorite tea or coffee and let her know that you know shes going to kill it tomorrow. If one of her friends gets in an accident, stop by and pay your respects (the friend will definitely let your ex know you stopped by). If your ex mentions she wanted to see a movie, buy her two tickets for her and her friend to see, and dont butt in. Your time will come soon.

• Go out for coffee or tea together. Ride your bikes into town. Hang out at the pool. Have conversations about things both of you find funny, or like talking about. Remember to act confident, be funny, and get that playfulness out so that she can see it.

3. Tell her you still have feelings for her. Once youve apologized and become her friend again, you can finally tell her you want her back. Try to pick a romantic spot to do this, and try to tell her when its just you two. It wont hurt if youre looking your best.

• Be honest about how you feel, within reason. Dont tell her what she might have done wrong in the relationship. Instead, focus on you. Let her know that youve thought a lot about where things went wrong, and show her all the ways in which youve changed. Tell her how youve become more patient, more forgiving, more aware of your own shortcomings, and be sure to back it up with action. If you say youve become more forgiving, be able to show her that youre not as quick to point out other peoples faults.

• You can say something like: "After we broke up, I realized I was looking for love in the wrong places. I realized that you gave me exactly what I need, and its really a shame that I had to realize that after we broke up. But I realize it now, and Id be stupid not to try to get you back, because youre exactly what I need."

• Or you can say something like: "You may not like it, but most of what I do now, I do it for you. Youve made a better person. I understand what it means to care for someone now that Ive been with you. I want to share that with you again, this time better. Because I cant deny that I still have feelings for you. Id be lying to myself and lying to the world."

• Assure her that you both can fix the issues that led to your breakup. Remember why you guys broke up in the first place, so you can learn from your own mistakes. Have a plan ready, and discuss that plan with her. Its no use in getting back together if you go through the same issues all over again. If you didnt listen to her feelings enough, be sure that youre listening when you tell her you like her. If you didnt get along with her friends, make an extra effort to get along with them. Have a plan to attack whats likely to go wrong, and youll impress the socks off of her.

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How to ruin your ex girlfriends life

A Massachusetts man was sentenced to seven years in prison after spending the better part of the past year tormenting his ex-girlfriend online, according to a WLJA report.

Boston native Bruce Stimon, 47, met Arlington, Va., resident Soraida Hicks on an airplane in 2011 and they began dating long distance shortly thereafter. Stimon showed Hicks with gifts during that time, including a new iPhone, which he put on his own family plan—a move that would allow him to access information belonging to her friends and contacts.

Then he used that contact information to tell Hicks friends that shed contracted an STD.


Hicks broke up with Stimon shortly after finding out about his antics, but the tormenting continued. Before long, Hicks started receiving phone calls from adult men in northern Virginia who were looking for an escort. She looked online and found that her name and face had started to show up on escort sites around the Web.
Whats more, Stimon had filled out some of her profiles with the phone numbers of her employer and direct supervisor. She was fired from her bank job just a few days before her daughters Twitter followers were made privy to a video of Hicks and Stimon having sex.

"It was devastating," Hicks daughter told WJLA. "I would go into the bathroom stall and just cry and would come back to class and act like everything was okay."

But it wasnt okay, and the abuse didnt stop. Stimon turned to porn sites to advertise Hicks and her daughter as a "mother and daughter" sex package. Eager readers started showing up at their doorstep a few days later.

Stimons scheming went on for months before police could catch him. It took his venturing from Boston down to the Hicks Arlington neighborhood in an effort to slash his ex-girlfriend’s tires to get the man arrested.

Hicks, whos been active in her efforts to get her name removed from the porn sites, reports that shes only had limited success.

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How to Make Out With a Girl in 40 seconds or less For Real

If you’ve ever seen a guy in a bar walk up to a girl he didn’t know and make out with her almost immediately, it can be a completely mind-blowing experience. It may seem like it’s magical or out of reach – a special ability or super-power that someone is born with.

But it’s not. And it can be broken down into a few simple steps you can follow in order to make the same thing happen for you. In this article, I’m going to break down those steps.
The first step is to realize that about 90% of the difference between someone who’s really good with women and someone who’s not so good or mediocre with women, is the ability to spot a woman who’s ready to make out.

How to Make Out With a Girl ?

I know it sounds kind of crazy at first, but it’s true. If you walk into a bar and go up to any woman without knowing what signs to look for, your odds of success go WAY down.

You must know how to spot that woman who’s already in this “make-out ready” state, so you can walk up and be “that guy.”

Don’t buy into the myth that women don’t want this to happen.

Women are as sexual (if not more sexual) than guys are. Most of the time, this “turbo” make-out session never happens, because so many guys are afraid to go for it. And when this doesn’t happen, the girls end up going home alone or worse.. staying being kind of mean to a lot of guys in the bar/being resentful and angry because no one’s approaching them.

By putting this technique into practice, You want to discover how to see the women who you’re able to make out with in 40 seconds or less in the first place.

There are a few excellent indicators that will (especially in a bar atmosphere) tell you if a woman is game, or ready for an instant make-out session.

What To Look For

The first indicator is a woman looking down often. When a woman looks down often, she is accessing her emotions.

Let me explain… When we look in different directions, we access different parts of our brain. These are called “Eye Accessing Cues.” When a woman is in a bar setting and looking down, she’s accessing her emotional brain.

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If she makes eye contact with you, looks down then back up again, she’s saying: “I have an emotional response to you looking at me and I’m looking down.” And if she tilts her head down as well (and doesn’t just use her eyes to look down), she’s physically dropping herself a little bit lower and showing submission.

This gives you the ability to walk up and be the dominant man.

Now, if she looks at you, smiles and doesn’t look away, this could be a lot more difficult situation. Socially, she’s meeting you head on, and not showing immediate submission.

Women who you’re going to be able to walk up to and make out with in 40 seconds or less should automatically take the submissive role as a woman. That’s one quality which shows you’ll be able to quickly make out with her.

Another quality is that she’s actively looking around to make eye contact. This is crucial. A woman who is engaged with someone specifically and she’s not looking away is not going to be as easy to seduce in 40 seconds or less. It’s going to take much longer.

Again, you’re going to have to play a totally different kind of game when you walk up. You can’t just walk up and make out with her.

So instead, if you see a woman who is in a conversation but she’s constantly looking around and trying to make eye contact with a lot of people, this is probably a very, very likely opportunity for you and that’s a woman you can walk up to and immediately become sexual with.

Other traits are revealed in the way they’re moving and how they’re dressed. Let’s say she’s standing with her feet about shoulder-width apart. It’s less likely that a woman standing like this is going to be available for you to walk up and dominate. That’s because she’s standing in a dominant position, with stronger body language and she’ll probably be a lot more resistant.

Instead, you want to find a woman who takes up less space. She has her legs closer together and seems to be outside of a group, looking around a little bit.

Another thing is the way she’s dressed. If she’s dressed in a way that’s super flashy and attracting lots of attention, she probably isn’t the kind of girl you can walk up to and make out with in 40 seconds.

This kind of women is looking for attention – not for someone to dominate them. What you want is someone who’s in between “I don’t care” and “Stare at my tits, bitch!” Somewhere between wearing sweatpants with an elastic waistband to the bar and done up really, really beautiful and sexy with a really low-cut shirt. You want to find someone who’s in between those two extremes.

A lot of women who are on vacation fall into this realm. They don’t want to over dress or under dress, and don’t know how the bar atmosphere is going to be. They’ll usually come in open-minded, and start looking around trying to make connections. This is an excellent situation for you (and her, of course).

That’s what to look for and how you spot her in the first place. If you see some of those, you want to watch her for a second. If you think that she is the kind of person you can walk up to and do this, then proceed.

If not, I’d actually suggest you proceed anyway, just to see what happens.

Next, right after you get that done and you’ve seen your girl (there are probably three or four of these girls in a bar at any given moment) you’re going to walk up and start the scary part.
What To Do
This is where the most powerful kind of frame control comes in. It’s very, very important that you understand how to control someone else’s frame if you want to come across like you’re a pro at this.

By “frame,” I basically mean their “reality.” You’re controlling what they experience. You have to be able to stay in control of that experience in order to really bring her to the level where she feels comfortable making out with you immediately.

I’m going to give you a very quick, punchy, fast way of doing this. I’ll explain as quick as possible; that way you can go straight out and try it…

Here’s what I would say, word-for-word… Walk up to a girl, when you get up to her and right when she makes eye contact with you, I want you to SLOWLY put your finger up by your lips and say this, “Shhh?”

Then slow your speech pattern down and deepen your vocal tonality. And immediately say, “Wait just one moment.”

You can also say, “Stop for one minute.” I suggest using a bit of NLP here. Whenever someone hears “stop,” “wait,” or “don’t,” they immediately register whatever comes after that.

So if I say, “Don’t think of a black cat,” what do you do? Immediately, you think of a black cat and whatever version of one you have in your head.

So if I said, “Don’t try to make out with me,” or “Don’t make out with me right now,” girls are going to be consciously hearing, “Don’t make out with me,” but their subconscious minds will be hearing, “Make out with me right now!”

You’re attempting to sort of use real-life Inception to get making-out with you to be HER idea. She should be thinking, “I should make out with this guy.”

Now, during frame control you’ll be using a lot of these subconscious triggers in order to get this to go as fast as possible. Please only use this for good. There are lots of evil ways to use this.

Don’t try to seduce women who don’t want to be seduced. Again, that’s one of the reasons why it’s important that you notice a woman who really does want to be seduced by a man.

So to recap so far: you walk up, you put your finger over your lips and you tell her to “Shhh” for a second and then you say a sentence that starts with “don’t” or “wait” or “stop.”

My typical is “Don’t worry… right now.” That’s all I say. And I slow that speech down ? “Don’t?worry?……. right now.”

Then I go right into the next statement, which is, “You and I are going to have a secret. We’re going to secretly kiss and no one will know.”

And as I’m saying this, I’m leaning in… and you’ll be doing the same when you do it. You’re leaning in ever… so… slowly. At the same time, you’re looking from her eyes down to her lips and back up to her eyes again.

This is called “Triangulating.” Count to three looking at her eyes, then look down to her lips and count to two, look back up and count to three, look down and count to two… etc. Do that about three or four times as you’re talking.

This can be a lot to remember, so you may want to practice it a little bit. I wouldn’t expect you’re going to get it perfect the first time.

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So again, you say, “We’re going to have a secret. We’re going to kiss and no one is going to know.” From here on out, you’re really just filling up space with words as you’re leaning in so you’re still controlling the interaction.

So you’re going to very, very slowly, take your right or left hand ? whichever one is more accessible ? and reach around her back. You won’t pull her in toward you or anything yet, just touch her very lightly.
Signs That It’s Working
Is she looking at your lips? If she’s looking at your lips, you have a green light to go forward. If she’s looking at your eyes, you may want to wait a second, or turn around and turn back again and try it again.

This resets the meter in her mind, so to speak. When you turn around and turn back again, most people consider this to be a fresh start in a conversation. It’s a strange loop-hole in psychology.

For some reason, that’s how we are as humans. When someone turns away then turns back, we give them another chance moving forward. So if you’re getting some resistance, turn around, turn back, smile, and continue. If she gives you resistance again, you probably should back off and find another woman.

If she’s looking at your lips and seems to be very comfortable and excited, then proceed. You’ll move in very closely and speak almost directly into her ear.
!Important!
In a loud environment like a bar, you’ll want to speak louder, but don’t raise your voice. Make your voice very low so that you have to be very, very close to her ear for her to hear.

Then you’re going to keep talking… What I usually say is, “No one is going to see this. It’s just going to be our little secret. I promise I won’t tell anybody only if you promise that you won’t tell anybody either.”

As I’m saying this into her ear, I make sure that she’s feeling my breath on her neck. So I’m sort of breathing out a little bit more than normal as I’m speaking so she can feel that hot air on her neck.

This usually gets a very visceral, deep, sexual response from women when you do this.

As you’re speaking really close to her ear, you’ll, very slowly, press your cheek against hers as you’re talking. Then you’ll move you head over so that your mouth is closer to hers, and then… you’ll start kissing her.

And if you do this right, you start out with just one soft peck… then go straight into making out. It may not seem like it in this description, but 40 seconds is a long time. This process can happen in a lot less than 40 seconds – I’ve done it in less time, and I’ve seen other guys do it, too.
Practice It
What I want you to do is practice this approach. Maybe go for a minute or two at first, and then get to where you can do this in about 40 (or even 30) seconds.

You won’t use this tactic all the time. But when the opportunity is right, it’s really good to have this in your seduction arsenal. You want to make sure that you have the right kind of tools for the job, so to speak.

Whenever you see a girl who’s in that state and ready to be seduced, if you beat around the bush, engage in small talk or generally waste time, she’ll be turned off and you’ve lost a golden seduction opportunity.

Instead, when you spot this, you want to be able to see her, know that that’s what she wants, go in, and give it to her immediately. This is the major difference between guys who are rock stars at walking up and seducing a woman… and guys who wish that they were great at quickly seducing a woman.

There are a lot of other success factors as well. There are techniques on how to speak with the right tonality… how to touch her that allows her to feel comfortable and doesn’t turn off any of her weird alert switches… specific NLP triggers that you can use to connect and make sure she’s totally in your zone.

What’s taken me from a normal dude to a well-respected dating coach, is knowing a lot of short-cuts like this and knowing when to bring them out. And these short-cuts can also improve your game with women.

Remember these characteristics in women who want to be seduced, and remember ? it is possible to make out with a woman in 40 seconds or less.

Discover my other top 3 “Seduction Secrets” in this special video presentation.

>> Click here to visit the The Tao of Badass official site <<

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Praying to get your ex back Pray to God for getting back together

We have a new video! It features our nine prayers for getting back an ex, set to music.

You can watch it on our main site, HelpGettingBackTogether.com.

Here is a sample of one of the prayers:

O God, almighty and all-knowing,
help me in my time of need.
Open my eyes to behold
the true heart of the one I love,
so that I may understand
what is required of me
to win back the affection and intimacy
we used to share.

Amen.

You can also watch it offsite at YouTube.com.

Comment and let us know what you think!
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Apology letter to ex after a breakup

I wish there were more sample letters like this out there. Its hard to figure out what you want to say to your ex, especially when you want to get back together.

Even harder, if youve been a little out of control -- like if youve been texting too often, or calling or driving by. You need to put a stop to all of that, and go NC (no contact) for a while until youre thinking straight again.

And you certainly need to apologize to your ex.

Even if you dont have anything to apologize for (and, well, are you sure about that?) a letter similar to this is still a good idea, to show that youre on board with breaking up. You wont get your ex back if you resist accepting the fact that you got dumped, no matter how unfair it seems.

But... to have to compose a letter when your heads a mess isnt easy. I think this example letter to an ex would be good for most breakup circumstances. You might have to change some parts, but its a good start.

-- Kit.

Letter of Apology to an Ex Lover - What to Say and How to Say It

By Dan K. Jenkins

When you look for advice on the internet about how to get your ex back, you discover that step one is to write a letter.

And you learn that it has to be a handwritten letter -- not typed, and not an email.

The purpose of the letter is to let your ex know youre sorry for whatever you did, and that you agree that breaking up is a good idea. This letter sets the stage for everything youll be doing afterwards, to try to get back together.

Why apologize in writing?

A hand-written letter, sent in a hand-addressed envelope, is the most personal form of delayed communication you can use.

Spoken communication, in person or over the phone, is too immediate. With immediate communication, some response is required -- but your ex might feel threatened, or feel like theres not enough time to think of the right response.

Text messages and email are too casual. Even a typed or printed letter feels distant, compared to the intimacy of a handwritten letter you took the time to pen yourself. Your letter to your ex absolutely must be written by hand, and written on paper, not on a card. A card is, once again, too casual.

When to apologize?

Send your letter as soon as possible, but be sure to wait until after you have thought about your situation, and think you understand what your ex is feeling.

While you compose your letter, you should feel regret, not anger. If you are still angry, then it is too soon to write a letter of apology. It is too soon to say you agree with the breakup.

You need to be certain about what you are apologizing FOR. For example:

• Did you hurt someones feelings?



• Is someone angry at you?



• Is someone afraid of you?



• Are you ashamed of something you said or did?



• Did you lie, steal, or cheat?



• Did you forget something important?

Even if it was an accident, you should apologize. Even if it felt justified at the time, you should apologize. Even if you know that in the same circumstances, you would do the same thing again -- you still ought to apologize.

What should you say in your letter?

Your letter of apology to your lover needs to communicate two things: That you are sorry for whatever you did that caused your breakup, and that you agree that breaking up is a good idea.

Dont spend too much time explaining why you did what you did. It wont help, especially if it was a repeat occurrence, or if you did it on purpose.

Dont be funny, and dont be crude or obscene.

Dont ask for an acknowledgement -- no, "Let me know if you got this" or anything like that. You should be prepared not to hear back.

Example apology letter

Here is a sample letter to an ex girlfriend...

Dear Amy,

I have been thinking a lot about how I hurt you, and I want to say Im sorry. I understand why you dont want to be with me any more. I agree it is a good idea.

Being away from you is hard on me, but I guess that after time goes by I wont miss you so much. I hope, anyway, because I would hate to feel like this forever.

I know it was the last straw. I know you think you cant trust me any more, after what I did. But please believe my apology. You mean more to me than anyone else does. You are the one I love.

Maybe after you have had some time away from me, you will want to talk to me again. If you ever need me, I will be there for you.

Love,
Kevin


Learn more about getting back together with your ex. Visit The Online Guide to Getting Back Together and find advice from experts on how to get your ex to come back to you.

This online guide will also lead you to professionally-written books with step-by-step instructions for getting back together with an ex.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Dan_K._Jenkins
http://EzineArticles.com/?Letter-of-Apology-to-an-Ex-Lover---What-to-Say-and-How-to-Say-It&id=2173025
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How to handle a crazy ex girlfriend

Victor the Cat, Blisstree’s resident relationship columnist is back to help you with your relationship dramas and dilemmas in 2011, starting with this one about a crazy ex who can’t seem to let go of her ex-boyfriend, even when he’s your current beau.

Hello Victor the Cat:

I’ve got a frustrating dilemma. My boyfriend and I have been together for one blissful year. I have — literally — no complaints and plenty of compliments about our relationship.

He and his previous girlfriend broke up about 1 1/2 years before we met. Theirs was a complicated relationship for about four years. In hindsight, my boyfriend feels that they were never really that well matched, and is very glad they broke up, although it was very painful for him when it happened.

About a month after he and I started dating, his ex started calling him and telling him she wanted him back, that she never imagined they wouldn’t end up being together forever. He was upfront with me about it, and at the time I told him if he needed a break from us to wrap up loose ends with his ex that I would understand. He said “No, it’s definitely over with her, I love you, etc etc.” And that was that.

But that wasn’t that. Since then she has contacted him several more times to tell him she misses him, and started asking him for money she says he owes her, at times becoming quite manipulative and mean. The last time she did this he asked her to not contact him ever again. But on New Year’s Eve he received a text: “Happy New Year’s – I’ll always love you,” which he promptly told me about and deleted.

Here’s my real dilemma: I’m not worried about my boyfriend at all.  If we were any more committed to each other, we’d need to be surgically attached (and trust me, it’s cute not creepy). But I find that I am now becoming obsessed with his ex – wanting to tell her off, wanting to make her stop, wanting to send her articles on how to get over a broken heart so she can stop being so disrespectful and maybe finally leave us alone! Why do I feel so strongly about this? And how can I manage my emotions better?

Thanks, my furry guru,

The Lucky One

Dear Lucky One:

My first thought is that you are entirely within your rights to be totally ticked off by the behavior of your boyfriend’s ex. You say they were together for four years and broke up 1 1/2 years before you and he met. So, by my calculations (and the undisputed relationship rule that says it should take you half the time you dated someone to actually get over them), miss crazy pants should’ve been nearly over her ex by the time you and he started seeing each other.

Clearly, this nut-job has serious boundary issues (as well as other issues relating to why she cannot seem to move forward and beyond her former relationship). Not only is she bothering your boyfriend with unwanted advances, she’s also negatively interfering with your relationship, which she obviously has no right to do. She is not welcome, and she knows it. But her irritating texts and phone calls are the only way she can attempt to exert some control, which is what she wants to do. (Mental note: She also has control issues.)

Now, I completely understand the desire to tell her off, make her stop, and send her links to articles about pathetic ex-girlfriends. But you must, I repeat, must resist the desire to do so! Why? Because that’s exactly what she wants you to do. She thrives on generating any kind of attention, good or bad (from your boyfriend, you, anyone else), so if you give her the satisfaction of any kind of response, then the terrorists have won. (In this case, the terrorists are your boyfriend’s ex.) I know this is tough advice to follow, because you really feel like you’d be teaching her an important and necessary life lesson, but trust me, you wouldn’t be. People like her don’t learn from rational and reasonable methods. In fact, people like her often don’t learn at all. So don’t provoke her, pity her.

Ignoring her will send a much, much stronger message than any telling off ever could. In the meantime, concentrate on all the positive aspects of your delightful relationship with your boyfriend. Eventually, his ex will get bored and move on (and will likely start bugging some other poor soul).

My second thought is that your story would make a great screenplay. At first, the audience thinks the guy is going to cheat with his ex. He doesn’t. Then they think the crazy ex is going to kill the boyfriend or new girlfriend. She doesn’t. Turns out, the nice, normal new girlfriend is the one who goes all “Single White Female” on the ex. At the very least, you should write this up as a screenplay treatment and pitch it to a few Hollywood studios. Not kidding. That’ll show your boyfriend’s ex!
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How to patch up with your ex girlfriend

Breakups are very painful experience that everybody needs to face once in their relationship. Things are not always remain same, sometime there is love romance and sometime there is fighting and arguments. When argument and fighting reached at sky level then breakup occurs from nowhere. if you’re having breakup with your boyfriend especially if your ex boyfriend is your first love and you spend most of your time with him then it is really shattering experience for you. However, patch up with your boyfriend is possible if you try to patch with your boyfriend. There are some tips for patching up with your boyfriend. Before following these tips I like to advice you to avoid doing mistakes that most people do. Read about these mistakes from getexbackguru.net .
 

• Start communicating with him:

   

If you want to win him back then you need to start communicating with her. Going for no-contact with him is not the good idea especially if he is not dating with any other girlfriend. There are many relationships that break because of less communication. Boys and girls have their own life, their need to make their career by themselves but spending some time and sharing happiness with your boyfriend make him feel you respecting him. Many girls think boys only want sex which is not true because boy need his girlfriend to respect him, to love him and to admire him.

• Give some time to him:

Don’t rush to get him back allow him to rethink about you and your both relationship. Surely, you both spend some romantic moments together and you both make future plan for your relationship. Let these romantic feelings start coming again in your ex boyfriend mind then do your efforts to patch with him. I know it is really difficult to spend days without the one you love most in your life, take some time in removing the misunderstandings that break your relationship with him.

• Wait for right time:

   

If you want to get your boyfriend back in your life then you need to wait for right time to start contacting your ex again. Many time boys first put their efforts to patch up things with their girlfriend. Allow some time and space to your ex. If you start sending bulk text message then your ex boyfriend never consider you again for his girlfriend. It is really difficult for your ex boyfriend to forget all romantic moment you both spend together. But if you keep on sending bulk text message then it puts negative feeling about you and your ex boyfriend starts avoiding you. Don’t try to make your ex boyfriend jealous by dating with new boyfriend it will never helps you.

• Don’t avoid him:

If you and your ex boyfriend meet somewhere accidentally, don’t try to avoid him. Instead, try to share smile with him and if he starts talking with you then replay to him but remember try to keep your meeting short with him. Don’t start begging to get back if he is interested but he surely start patching up things with you. Don’t try to blame him for all the misunderstandings that take place previously in your relationship. Forget and forgive all mistakes that he made in the past.

These are 4 tips about how to get your ex back that will help you in getting your ex boyfriend back. The most important tool to get your ex boyfriend back is patience. Don’t rush to get ex boyfriend back, wait for right time and when your boyfriend contact you for meeting, try to patch up your breakup from your side and your boyfriend will follow your guidance.

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Relationship Breakups What You Need To Know

Relationship breakups are a terrible thing, and are devastating for most people. What most people want, more than anything else, is to find someone to spend their lives with, someone who will always be there for you. Thinking you have this and then losing it is one of the worst events most people will suffer in their life.
After relationship breakups, people tend to suffer from the same kind of emotional healing process that people who have suffered the death of a loved one. This isnt surprising, since the death of a relationship is very much like the death of someone. But unlike the death of a person, sometimes something can be done to take back the death of a relationship.

Relationship breakups do not have to be forever in many cases. Far more relationships can be saved than those that are permanently destroyed. What you have to know and understand is the various kinds of relationship breakups that exists and what you can do about them.

This article is going to give you a brief look into the kinds of relationship breakups and what strategies youll need to undertake to fix them. Not all relationships can be repaired, and not all of them should be, but most of them can. You just need to know the right techniques for each kind of breakup.

The Abusive Relationship Breakups
This is a breakup that should stay a break up. Unlike the other relationship breakups, this one can and should stick. Theres a chance that you may be considering returning to someone who physically or mentally abused you, but you need to stick with this kind of breakup. No one should take being abused.

The Mutual Breakup
Sometimes, both people in the relationship may want out and the relationship ends by mutual consent. Now, if this is truly a mutual breakup, theres a good chance that this is another relationship that shouldnt be repaired. On the other hand, if it was just called a relationship and was really one of the next two kinds of relationship breakups, thats a different matter entirely.

They Broke Up with You
This is usually the most hurtful kind of break up. If this has happened to you, what you need to do first is figure out exactly why the relationship ended. Once you know this, you have to decide if what went wrong is something you could or should fix. If it is something you can and should fix, then this needs to be your starting point.

You Broke Up with Them
Sometimes, we break up with people and then realize weve thrown away something good. When this happens, the first thing you need to do is reestablish trust. This means that youre going to essentially start the relationship over. Start slow, with coffee dates or something similar, and then work your way slowly towards repairing the relationship.

No matter which of the relationship breakups youve experienced, you need to be aware that help is out there. You just need to find the right kind of advice and instruction to allow you to mend feeling and repair your relationship and get your ex back.
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I Want My Ex Back How Can I Get Them Back

So youve been on your own for a couple of weeks now and you wake up one morning with this burning thought in your mind “I want my ex back!”  Which is a pretty normal reaction if you find that youre still in love with your ex.  What is also natural is that you will find you have no real idea how to go about getting them back.  So you end up looking around for help in order that you dont make a complete mess in your attempt to win them back.
Well first of all, before you go off trying to get your ex back, make sure that youre not going through the natural grieving process that comes at the end of a relationship.  At the end of most  relationships there is a period when the hurt and missing is so intense that it is akin to the grieving process.  During this process it is very natural to have the feeling “I want my ex back!”and for that feeling to be all consuming.
This is because you are grieving for all the dreams and hopes you had that were wrapped up in your ex love and your ex relationship.  So make real sure that youre not going through this process before you attempt to get them back.
Assuming that it is more than natural grieving, you are now ready to make good on your thought that “I want my ex back!” your next move should always be to figure out what went wrong. 
This is important, because unless you take the time to go over the mistakes that you might have made, then getting back with your ex will only eventually lead to the same break down in the relationship as before and that will do neither of you any good.  So own your mistakes and anything that you might have done wrong to contribute to the break down of the relationship.
A vital tip to remember is not to focus on what you believe your ex might have done wrong.  Let them take care of their stuff for now and you take care of your own.  There is time in the future for the two of you to dig around in the collective causes, but for now, you must work on your own issues and mistakes.  
If youre sincerely clear that “I want my ex back!” then all that has been outlined is really the start that you need to take to get back with your ex and to secure a future for the two of you that will not fall into the same mistakes and pitfalls of before.
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Series Communicating with your ex Part 1

Ive been thinking lately about how people communicate with their exes.

For the most part, people dont. Exceptions are when they work together, have classes together, go to church together, etc.

Another exception is when one of the partners wants to get back together. Usually, if someone wants to get an ex back, there will be communication. In fact, there may be all too much communication.

The last exception arises when a couple has children. Here is an article I found, about communicating in that situation. -- Kit.

Communicating With Your Ex - Letting Go of the Last Word

By Mary Wollard

You probably all have someone in your family who has to have the last word in any discussion or argument. Maybe your whole family is like this, making family get-togethers challenging at best. In the case of email, this can lead to back-and-forth messages that belabor a subject way longer than necessary, with each new message escalating the conflict higher and higher.

If you are someone who needs to have the last word and your communications with your ex are difficult, be aware that this is only adding to the conflict. It will take great restraint on your part to break the pattern. After all, it took a long time to cultivate the need to have the last word and it will take a long time to feel comfortable not having the last word. The only way to break the cycle is to just resist the urge to say one more thing.

Start with a conversation that you feel neutral about, and just try not responding to the last thing the other person said. As you become more comfortable with this in relatively unimportant conversations, then you can move on to practicing in areas that are more important. Work slowly, but work at it constantly. It will be hard work because this is a very hard habit to break, but the rewards will be great.

If it is the other parent who needs the last word, know that it is not a sign of weakness on your part to let him or her have it. Know that this communication pattern in the other person started way before you ever came into the picture and likely affects every relationship they have. But you can still take responsibility for your part in these never-ending discussions.

Even if the other person hasnt yet done the work necessary to end this communication merry-go-round, you can. If you follow the steps above, the cycle will stop. Start with a subject that is not highly charged, and just let the conversation go when you have said what you have to say.

The important thing is to make the decision to break this communication cycle. If you do, I guarantee you will feel more powerful in the relationship, not less powerful.

© 2009, Mary Wollard, J.D., Family Solutions Center, LLC

Mary A. Wollard, JD, is an attorney, mediator, and arbitrator with over 20 years experience in solving the legal issues of divorce, parenting (custody), marital property and support. In addition to helping families through mediation and arbitration, Ms. Wollard provides parenting coordination and decision-making services to families when on-going conflict prevents them from fully implementing their parenting plan after divorce. Visit http://www.cofamilysolutions.com/downloads.htm for free downloadable worksheets you can use to organize your familys transition.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Mary_Wollard
http://EzineArticles.com/?Communicating-With-Your-Ex---Letting-Go-of-the-Last-Word&id=2193378

---

Series continues with Part 2 and Part 3.
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Rebound Relationships How To Improve The Chances Of Success

People often say rebound relationships don’t work. I don’t agree as there are plenty of happy couples out there who met shortly after breaking up with someone else.

So what defines a rebound relationship? Usually it is where someone starts going out with another person very soon after leaving or being left by a former lover. If you have met somebody who seems to tick all the boxes you were looking for in a partner, I certainly would not dump them.  Yes, they could dump you, but so could anyone new that you meet; so why worry about it. You could just as easily be the person they have been looking for.

Relationships break down for all sorts of reasons. It is actually more common for two people to grow apart rather than separate due to an affair or similar reason. If your current partner split from his/her ex, they did it for a reason. If they had been together for a long time, they probably grew apart. Or they may have realised that once the initial attraction had worn off, they were not compatible enough to sustain a long term relationship.

If your new lover has just recently rejoined the single scene, you do need to be a little careful. But you would proceed slowly when dating any new person; wouldn’t you?  Try to find out why they split with their partner, but for heaven’s sake, don’t make them feel like they are being interrogated. Men in particular are very slow to speak about their feelings. If he doesn’t want to talk about it, do not jump to the conclusion that he doesn’t like you or find you attractive. 

I would also advise against asking to see a picture of the former partner. You do not want to start comparing yourself to them and it is difficult not to do this when you know what they look like. If you are part of the same social circle, it could be even harder not to draw comparisons. If you don’t do it yourself, you may find some of your mutual friends do. Try to discourage/ignore these conversations as they are unhelpful. Nobody knows what  happened between a couple other than those two people.
 
If you are the one on the rebound you need to be sure of your motivation for getting involved. Are you looking for a short fling or a long term love affair?  Whatever you do, don’t get involved with another man to make your ex jealous or for revenge. It rarely works and it isn’t fair to play with the new persons emotions.
You may find, just like I did, that your rebound relationship never ends and in fact turns into the love affair of the century. We all need some more fun in our life so try to enjoy yourself with your new partner and see where it leads.  Whoever says you should avoid rebound relationships is missing out on a whole lot of fun.
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Getting your ex to forgive you

You can get your ex to forgive you, but when you ask your ex might not grant you forgiveness or a 2nd chance right away.

It happens: You commit some terrible offense against your partner and it results in an emotional fight and a huge breakup.

Truth is, people make mistakes within their relationships all the time. Its normal. And people forgive each other too, but sometimes that takes a while. You can get your second chance but your partner might not be able to give it to you right away.

First, you need to back away from the situation. Allow some time to pass... and devote a little of that time to learning how to ask for forgiveness. Your ex might take you back if you are convincing enough about being sorry and wanting your relationship to be saved.

Read more of How to ask for forgiveness from your ex

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How to pick up an ex girlfriend

One of the most painful things a man can experience in his lifetime is breaking up with a cherished girlfriend. Whether you saw it coming or not isn’t really important right now. Your heart is aching and you’re experiencing the feeling of intense loneliness without her by your side. This situation is severely impacting your happiness right now.

You’re probably sitting there trying your best to think of ways to get your ex girlfriend to come back to you. I’m sure your first instinct is to go on over to her house and try to reason with her so she’ll take you back.

Before you do something you’ll regret later, take a moment to consider some things first:

1) Are you focusing mostly on the breakup and not what caused the breakup?

Your gut is telling you to do something that will end this painful situation quick. I can see why you’d feel that way. Nobody likes feeling heartache. Your natural tendency is to focus on the physical separation between you two. Take a moment, though, to think about all the things that may have led to you two splitting up.

Relationships don’t fall apart for no reason.

What kind of problems were you having before things got to this point?

What did you argue about the most?

When did things turn from good to bad?

Answering these questions honestly will help you figure out what went wrong and how you might be able to improve those things and get back on track.

2) Realize that this is an opportunity for you to improve your life

Your mind is a powerful thing and you can control how you handle your current situation. Instead of depression and anxiety, choose to be empowered and enlightened. Everyone has something about themselves they can work on. Your broken heart can not only heal, but you can become a generally happier person if you choose to be that way.

Start paying attention to the way you look and feel everyday. If you can stand to lose a few pounds, then now is the time to focus on getting in shape. If you know you need to stop smoking or drinking too much, then now is a good time to work on these issues. If you want to expand your knowledge, then take a class or go to the library and borrow books on interesting topics.

Feed your mind and body with good things and you’ll be amazed at the response you get from your ex love.

3) Create a getting back with your girlfriend plan

There is no way you’re going to be able to force your way back into your girlfriend’s life by acting angry, phony, insincere, too needy or playing childish games. No, you need a real strategy for winning her back.

This is a woman that means a lot to you so you’re going to need a plan of action that will be tailored to getting her to see that you’re the only one who can give her all the love and attention she needs.

To do this, you’re going to have to be brutally honest with yourself about your strengths and weaknesses.

What do you have to offer her? What do you bring to the table? What is she really seeking in a lifetime partner? Your plan must take all of this into consideration in order for you to reach your goal.
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How to know if your ex girlfriend wants you back

Have you recently broken up with your girlfriend and trying to win her back? Do you still find it difficult accepting that she is gone? Is it still difficult for you believing that this was someone who not too long ago, couldn’t just live without you but today seems doesn’t even give a hoot about your existence? Are you contemplating trying to win her back or lacking the courage and or knowledge to get her back?

Fortunately, you should realize that the chances of your getting her back are alive and well. That is, if she is in any way displaying any of the following signs which generally indicate that she still have an interest in getting back together with you. All you need to do is to be tactful in how you handle the situation as you attempt winning her back for good.

1. Constantly tries to keep in touch

Is she always calling you, texting or emailing you to check on how you are doing? While at the surface it might seem normal for her to want know how you are doing, you should be able to tell when she wants to keep you in her daily life. If she was really over you, she wouldn’t be that bothered.

Things are this point can get a little tricky, because if you allow the situation to persist, you may from being a temporary ex boyfriend become her permanent friend, a situation you really don’t want to get into. So while not ignoring her altogether which you really can’t afford to do, you should keep a healthy distance.

2. Becomes jealous at the mention of other girls

It is a good sign of her lingering interest in you if your ex girlfriend reacts to certain things you do or say. Of particular interest here is she often gets jealous whenever you unintentionally talk about other girls. The later indicates that she is not fully ready to let go of you yet even when she apparently appears not wanting to take you back. She still believes that you “belong” to her to a certain degree.

As a caution, try and appreciate the fact that she still has feelings for you which present an opportunity for you to get back into her life, rather than abusing the privilege and purposely trying to get her to become jealous. Remember that she still has the upper hand and that you are not yet emotional strong enough to start playing mind games with her.

3. Tries to make you feel jealous

As if her getting jealous is not enough, a sure sign that you are well on target to getting her back will be if see seem to be trying to make you feel jealous by equally mentioning other guys. However, most guys at this stage might wrongly interpret this as a sign that she might have moved on.

You need to really study her body language at this stage more so if she has shown any previous sign of jealousy as aforementioned. You must remain calm and calculated, as this will make her to try harder in getting you to react thus disarming her.

4. Excessive flirting and unbecoming conduct

This is a simple sign that there is still some element of attraction between you and her. While these signs might seem like an open invitation to get back into the relationship, it is however better to give her some space.

While the attraction still appears to be there it is not enough to keep her, let her come to her own conclusion on your ability to give her what she wants. If you jump in too early, you risk blowing it all away.

5. Keeps “Loose Ends”

How much of her stuffs are still in your apartment? Why does she keep dropping by every now and then to pick up one thing or the other? Simple, by leaving some of her stuff in your place, she has an open invitation to come to your place on a regular basis. Your ex girlfriend is simply not ready to let go of you yet.
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Is it easier to get your girlfriend back than to find someone new

Here is an excerpt from a new article:

I can tell that being in a relationship was a large source of Davids self-esteem. Secretly, he was proud of being a "regular guy" who had a girlfriend. It made him feel like a man.

Now, he thinks his male friends see him as a failure for getting dumped. He feels embarrassed about it.

He wants to get back the security and status of being in a relationship — but to him, getting back a woman he has already been intimate with seems a whole lot easier than trying to meet new women, and get close to one of them.

Read the full text here, about why for some guys, getting a girlfriend back is the easier option: Is it easier to get your girlfriend back than to find someone new?
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Why Men Leave Their Wives

Todays women can find it challenging sometimes to keep their marriages intact and happy. Many women wonder why men leave their wives and what they can do to make sure it doesnt happen to them.
The truth of the matter is that our society has made it very difficult for men and women to find long term loving relationships.  Why? Because the rules our society has adopted are based on inaccurate information.
One of the most obvious misconception that is pervasive throughout our society is the idea that men only want sex and/or have a much higher sex drive than women.  The truth is that men and women have similar sex drives but men have been encouraged, by society, to fulfill their needs while women have been discouraged from having sex until they are married. 
This leads to many misunderstandings between men and women and how they approach their relationships.  It might mean a man will be more tempted to cheat on his wife because after all, its in his nature.  And it could mean that a women uses sex with the hopes of keeping her husband in love with her so he will stay in the marriage.
If we really got to the bottom of things though we would understand that men and women want basically the same things in a relationship.  Both want to feel loved, respected, and desired by their partners.  When you break it down like that it doesnt really seem all that hard, does it?
If you want to keep your marriage strong try to meet your husbands needs...all of them, not just sexually. A word of caution here though.  Because of the way our society has told us to behave women have the tendency to think that they have to meet their husbands needs even if that means ignoring their own.  No! All that will do is make you resentful and bitter and that wont keep a marriage intact.
While its important to try to meet your husbands needs it cant be done to the detriment of your own.  Dont put your wants and needs on hold to satisfy your husband, youll be unhappy, hell be unhappy (and bored) and the marriage wont last.  For a marriage to thrive both parties need to be happy, healthy, stable, and have their needs being met on a regular basis.
So for any women who wants to know why men leave their wives its usually because his needs arent being met, and I dont just mean his sexual needs.  I mean on some level he doesnt feel like you love, desire, or respect him and he will try to find someone who will.
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How to quickly get your ex girlfriend back

When reality sets in, and relationships end, you are girl may still have lingering questions if its really the end between the two of you.  Sometimes guys just cannot admit to themselves that their girlfriend dumped them and think that its never working out.  Well at least that was how I felt before.  Amidst all the confusion, hurt pride and longing, I only have one think in mind, "I want to get my ex girlfriend back fast and for good".

If you are like me, I dont give up just easily.  So, I gathered up whats left of my pride and laid out my plan to win back her heart and mind.  I told myself I am going to get back that kiss that once was mine.  I will take nothing less. 

In order to get back together with your ex girlfriend, there are numerous steps to take. Here are some of the tips that you should keep in mind when working through this process.

1. There is always a second chance for everyone, so its not impossible for you to get back together with your ex girlfriend. But first, you should ask yourself some questions Do you still love her? Do you really want her back? Why? Are you trying to get her back because you dont want to be alone, or you dont believe you should have been dumped? If you are looking to get back with your ex for reasons other than love, you may be playing a dangerous game that would be better off avoided.
2. Do not appear desperate or needy to your girlfriend if your priority is "how can I get back together with my ex girlfriend?" Although you may feel desperate, and you may really want her back, you absolutely need to control your emotions, keeping them to yourself. If you cannot help them, then it may be wise to talk to your friends or family so you can cry your heart out where she cannot see. Do not beg or cry in front of your girlfriend, however, and absolutely do not stalk her. 
3. Learn how to control your feelings, forgetting about self pity and instead working on the positive aspects of working things through with your ex. If you appear too needy, or if you come off as too desperate, she may end up avoiding you even more.
4. Keep the communication lines with your ex open. She may have ended the relationship, but you just need to make her feel like communication lines are open and that you want to be civil. You do not have to be the one initiating the conversation, but you should be willing to say hello and have a conversation occasionally with her, keeping in touch casually. 
5. Above all else, analyze what went awry with the relationship. There must have been a problem that led to the end of the relationship, so find out what the problem was if you want to get back together with your ex. Find out what caused the arguments, of which of her needs werent being met, and work on rectifying those issues.

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Understanding The Wife Husband Relationship

The wife husband relationship can be a complicated one. Many marriages fail because one or both partners don’t really understand the dynamic of the relationship. If even one person has a basic understanding of it, the marriage is bound to be stronger. But if both people understand how a wife husband relationship works, then it has the best chance of being a good marriage.
One of the keys to understanding the wife husband relationship is to realize just how different men and women really are. Aside from the obvious physical differences, the sexes are different emotionally and mentally, too.
When faced with a problem, for instance, men and women tend to approach it from completely different angles. Women are more likely to discuss it with other people. They might get advice and input from a few friends. It’s not uncommon for women to talk about the problem at length.
That’s because women solve problems when they talk about them. They explore all the angles of the issue and how they feel about it, and often in doing so a solution appears.
Men, on the other hand, tend to be more tight-lipped about problems. They think about it more than they talk about it. It’s more common for a man to ponder a problem and say little until he’s figured out the solution.
In the wife husband relationship this difference in problem solving can itself be a problem. He might think that she’s talking it to death when she should be trying to figure it out herself. And she might think he’s not even worried about something because he’s not talking about it .When in reality, it’s on his mind all the time and he’s just not pointing it out.
Sometimes, women tend to talk about things that they don’t necessarily want help with, or advice about. They simply want someone to listen to their opinion and thoughts. Where if a man is talking about something, it’s because he wants an answer.
If a woman is talking about something just to get it off her chest or vent, other women tend to get that and offer support. They don’t try to tell her what to do for the most part, but simply join in the conversation in empathy.
A man might simply state a solution and tell the woman what she should do, thinking he’s being very helpful and doing what he’s supposed to. But really, the woman will feel that he’s not listening and instead just trying to end the conversation.
Of course, not every wife husband relationship will happen exactly like these examples. Some men will talk out a problem and some women will be tight-lipped about it. But in general, the sexes can be expected to follow these typically patterns.
Understanding those patterns can help you stop yourself before you do something that’s natural to you. You can think about what your partner needs from you instead, and do that .Your wife husband relationship will be much stronger and happier because of it.
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Getting your babys father back

Want to bring your babys daddy back into your life?

Breaking up with a guy and facing the pain is hard enough when it is just between you and him, but when you have a child together, it can be extremely painful. But if you decide that you want your babys father back, then having the bond through your child can actually benefit you. Following are some tips to help you get him back without a lot of drama.

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How to quickly get over your ex girlfriend

Need someone to blame for your lackluster love life? Point your finger at your ex. According to a new study from the University of Toronto, your old flame gives you fits long after the breakup.

Researchers tracked 123 people in relationships for six months, asking them to rate their feelings of affection both for their current partner and their most recent past partner. Turns out that as your current relationship goes sour, you begin to wistfully reminisce about the good times with your ex. “She starts to seem like a much better alternative when your new relationship isn’t going well,” says study author Stephanie Spielmann, a Ph.D. candidate in psychology at Toronto.

What’s more, people who started a relationship with relatively positive feelings for their ex saw their new relationship quickly fall apart, the study found.

That doesn’t mean you should let nostalgia for your ex push aside the legitimate reasons why you broke up. “Trying to get back together is often associated with feelings of anger, hostility and sadness,” Spielmann says. “Plus, on-again, off-again relationships tend to be of lower quality.” It’s true: According to new research from Kansas State University, people in cyclical relationships tend to feel less satisfied, have lower self-esteem, and have more doubts about the future of their relationship than more stable couples.

In order to forge a new dating path without worrying about your ex, you need to make your breakup stick. Here’s how. (And for more tips on cutting bait, learn How to Send Her Packing for Good.)

1. Renew Your Space

You were probably wise enough to give back her stuff, and you may have even tossed most of her gifts (although we don’t blame you for keeping that signed NFL game ball). But plenty of your belongings can remind you of your ex. “Get rid of that blanket you cuddled together under, move your bed, buy a new bedspread, and rearrange your couch and your flatscreen so the familiar look of your living room doesn’t stir up old memories,” says Melysha Acharya, founder of BrokenHeartedGirl.com and author of The Breakup Workbook for Men.

2. Get an Outside Perspective

Ask your close friends what they really thought of your ex-girlfriend. “The key questions to ask are: ‘Did I seem happy with my ex?’ and ‘Did you think she was good for me?’” says Acharya. Their unvarnished opinion will help you see past your idealized memories. If she broke your heart, chances are your friends will loyally hate her for you. But if it turns out they actually liked your ex, take that as a sign that you’re meeting the right women and you’ll be able to find a better match soon. (Living in the city? Discover 3 Ways to Meet the Woman of Your Dreams.)

3. Rebuild Your Ego

You may feel like you’ll never meet anyone better than your ex, and you fear you’ll be alone forever. So even if you’re not ready to date yet, set up an online dating profile and browse the available women in your area. A 2009 study by Spielmann found that merely thinking about the number of available women you know helps reduce feelings of attachment to your ex. (Read The 10 Commandments of Online Dating before plunging ahead.)
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