What Is The Remedy For A Broken Heart

Unless you have been lucky, you have probably been badly hurt when a relationship ended. Just what is the remedy for a broken heart?
Your first step is to see if your relationship can be salvaged. Sometimes in the heat of the situation we can do things we later regret.  Perhaps you dumped your other half but now think you were too hasty. Why not see will he or she take you back? It is worth apologizing and asking for another chance if you feel this person is your significant other.
It may be that you both said things that you regret. Often couples can come under severe stress due to financial worries, concerns over children, health not to mention families. See if your relationship is worth saving . You can go to counseling for unbiased help and advice. It is worth a shot, as getting back together with your loved one, is a very good remedy for a broken heart.
Sometimes though a relationship ends and it is final. Yes you will feel like you could never be happy again but with time your feelings will change. Treat the period, after a difficult breakup, exactly like you would if that person had died.  Allow yourself time to grieve for what you have lost but then acknowledge it is time to move on. 
You need to look after yourself. Why not take that holiday you always wanted or go visit some family and friends. Make changes to your daily routine. Your life will be different now so instead of approaching it with fear, grab this opportunity with both hands. Who knows, something or someone better may just be around that next corner.
I do not believe that we only have one soul mate in life. Sure partners who meet when they are teenagers and are still together in their eighties are great. But there are other twosomes out there who may have made mistakes in their respective pasts but have now found happiness again.
We change as people as we travel through the journey of life. Sometimes our significant other changes as well and as a couple, we adapt and stick together.  Often though, we find we want different things and while you may be heartbroken at first, you may ultimately be happier with someone else; or even on your own.
If you find that your heartbreak is overwhelming, please speak to someone. There are plenty of counselors and charities that help those who are suffering from a broken heart. Consider helping others as well. When we go and visit sick people in hospital, help out at a childrens school or visit elderly neighbors, we often forget about our own problems. 
It is very easy to wallow in feeling of sadness but that will only breed despair. Life is too short to be miserable. You have complete control over your feelings. So get out there and find yourself the best remedy for a broken heart.
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I Want My Ex Back How Can I Get Them Back

So youve been on your own for a couple of weeks now and you wake up one morning with this burning thought in your mind “I want my ex back!”  Which is a pretty normal reaction if you find that youre still in love with your ex.  What is also natural is that you will find you have no real idea how to go about getting them back.  So you end up looking around for help in order that you dont make a complete mess in your attempt to win them back.
Well first of all, before you go off trying to get your ex back, make sure that youre not going through the natural grieving process that comes at the end of a relationship.  At the end of most  relationships there is a period when the hurt and missing is so intense that it is akin to the grieving process.  During this process it is very natural to have the feeling “I want my ex back!”and for that feeling to be all consuming.
This is because you are grieving for all the dreams and hopes you had that were wrapped up in your ex love and your ex relationship.  So make real sure that youre not going through this process before you attempt to get them back.
Assuming that it is more than natural grieving, you are now ready to make good on your thought that “I want my ex back!” your next move should always be to figure out what went wrong. 
This is important, because unless you take the time to go over the mistakes that you might have made, then getting back with your ex will only eventually lead to the same break down in the relationship as before and that will do neither of you any good.  So own your mistakes and anything that you might have done wrong to contribute to the break down of the relationship.
A vital tip to remember is not to focus on what you believe your ex might have done wrong.  Let them take care of their stuff for now and you take care of your own.  There is time in the future for the two of you to dig around in the collective causes, but for now, you must work on your own issues and mistakes.  
If youre sincerely clear that “I want my ex back!” then all that has been outlined is really the start that you need to take to get back with your ex and to secure a future for the two of you that will not fall into the same mistakes and pitfalls of before.
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Why Men Leave Their Wives

Todays women can find it challenging sometimes to keep their marriages intact and happy. Many women wonder why men leave their wives and what they can do to make sure it doesnt happen to them.
The truth of the matter is that our society has made it very difficult for men and women to find long term loving relationships.  Why? Because the rules our society has adopted are based on inaccurate information.
One of the most obvious misconception that is pervasive throughout our society is the idea that men only want sex and/or have a much higher sex drive than women.  The truth is that men and women have similar sex drives but men have been encouraged, by society, to fulfill their needs while women have been discouraged from having sex until they are married. 
This leads to many misunderstandings between men and women and how they approach their relationships.  It might mean a man will be more tempted to cheat on his wife because after all, its in his nature.  And it could mean that a women uses sex with the hopes of keeping her husband in love with her so he will stay in the marriage.
If we really got to the bottom of things though we would understand that men and women want basically the same things in a relationship.  Both want to feel loved, respected, and desired by their partners.  When you break it down like that it doesnt really seem all that hard, does it?
If you want to keep your marriage strong try to meet your husbands needs...all of them, not just sexually. A word of caution here though.  Because of the way our society has told us to behave women have the tendency to think that they have to meet their husbands needs even if that means ignoring their own.  No! All that will do is make you resentful and bitter and that wont keep a marriage intact.
While its important to try to meet your husbands needs it cant be done to the detriment of your own.  Dont put your wants and needs on hold to satisfy your husband, youll be unhappy, hell be unhappy (and bored) and the marriage wont last.  For a marriage to thrive both parties need to be happy, healthy, stable, and have their needs being met on a regular basis.
So for any women who wants to know why men leave their wives its usually because his needs arent being met, and I dont just mean his sexual needs.  I mean on some level he doesnt feel like you love, desire, or respect him and he will try to find someone who will.
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Why Men Leave Pregnant Women

If you have wondered, hopefully not from personal experience, why men leave pregnant women there are many reasons. If the woman is his wife than it will probably be completely unexpected; after all he committed to the marriage why bail now? 
Other than the unexpectedness of a married man leaving his pregnant wife, its usually pretty easy to spot the type of man who would leave his pregnant girlfriend.  I think all women need to use common sense before they get intimately involved with any man. 
First of all if you are entering into an intimate relationship  with a man before you have really gotten to know him you have to be aware that there are many  potential dangers besides unexpected pregnancy.  If youve been in the relationship for at least a little time there have probably been many signs that this guy is a loser.
Women are too quick to forgive bad behavior in the men they date.  They will say things like "hes got a good heart, "thats just the way he was raised", "its a guy thing", etc. to justify the selfish and inconsiderate things their boyfriends do. If youre this type of woman you really should get counseling so you can understand why you would settle for this type of relationship.
The reality is that some men just dont like women and they get off on treating them badly.  For some guys it can be a real ego boost to treat his girlfriend like trash and have her keep coming back for more.  If youre in a relationship with that type of guy its not too much of a stretch to think he might leave you if you got pregnant.
Any man who is verbally, emotionally, and especially physically abusive will more than likely leave you whenever the relationship isnt convenient for him.  If your man exhibits any of these traits you should make darn sure that you dont accidentally get pregnant.  Even if he doesnt leave, he is already abusive and once you are tied down with a child that abuse is almost guaranteed to increase.
So if you are with a man who doesnt treat you with love, affection, and respect, you shouldnt be surprised to find yourself all on your own if you become pregnant.  Im not sure why men leave pregnant women expect that the term man is probably not a very accurate description of these types of guys.
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Gails child anxiety articles

Im told I did that wrong. Heres Gails whole list of articles about anxiety and panic attacks in children.

http://anxietychildren.info/anxiety-free-child-review.htm

http://anxietychildren.info/panic-attacks-in-children-how-to-help.htm

http://anxietychildren.info/childhood-phobias.htm

http://anxietychildren.info/separation-anxiety-in-children-five-ways-to-help.htm

http://anxietychildren.info/how-to-help-an-anxious-child.htm

http://anxietychildren.info/teen-anxiety.htm

http://anxietychildren.info/adolescent-anxiety-symptoms.htm

http://anxietychildren.info/child-anxiety-disorder-what-is-what-causes.htm

http://anxietychildren.info/panic-attacks-in-kids-understanding-what-causes-the-fear.htm

http://anxietychildren.info/treating-children-with-anxiety.htm

http://anxietychildren.info/teen-anxiety-what-it-is-and-how-to-treat-it-naturally.htm

http://anxietychildren.info/managing-anxiety-in-children-control-panic-attacks.htm

http://anxietychildren.info/child-anxiety-disorders-natural-treatments.htm

http://anxietychildren.info/anxiety-symptoms-in-children-how-to-treat.htm


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I Want My Wife Back 3 Tips

If you’re saying, “I want my wife back,” but you’re unsure where to start, there are some easy things you can do to make it possible. While no one tip or set of tips are going to guarantee that you’ll get your wife back, some things do work better than others. Soon you may not be saying, “I want my wife back,” but “why didn’t I do these things years ago?”
Being extra nice and polite is the first thing you have to do. That sounds ridiculously simple, doesn’t it? But when we’re with someone for a while, we tend to take them for granted. And if right now you’re saying, “I want my wife back” then this applies to you.
No matter what happens, you need to be on an even keel, nice and polite. Unfortunately, it’s easier to be nice and polite when you’re still together because you see her more often. But it is possible to run into someone often “accidentally on-purpose,” especially if you live in a small town or are part of a close-knit community.
Run into her often and use every moment you’re near her as an opportunity to show her that you can be considerate and polite. The important thing is to avoid things like getting angry or impatient with her.
Sometimes this is a difficult thing to judge. You might think your wife wants you to be jealous. Or you might think the whole breakup is a ploy to get you to act differently. If you keep thinking of the breakup along those terms, you’re in for a disappointment.
Sometimes people do break up with someone to prove a point and to get their lover to come around to their way of thinking. But most often it’s not a game, and the person left because they were unhappy with you and the relationship.
If you’re saying, “I want my wife back!” and you’re trying to convince yourself that she didn’t really intend to leave you, but instead meant get a rise out of you, stop thinking that way now.
You simply shouldn’t presume to know something that could be completely wrong. So assume that she had reasons that were good enough for her. And show her that there’s more to you than meets the eye.
So from being nice and polite, we move into being thoughtful. They are different things, though they’re overlapping, too. Being nice and polite can apply to everyday situations. Being thoughtful means going that extra mile.
Try sending her a card telling her she’s special. Send it for no real reason, no occasion, except to remind her that you think she’s special. Surprise her in a way you probably rarely did when you were together, and reap the rewards.
Finally, be thoughtful enough to leave her alone. You might think, “I want my wife back,” but if she’s not ready to try and you keep hounding her on the issue, you’ll only drive her further away.
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Three things NOT TO DO if you want to get your ex back

From the article: Three things NOT TO DO if you want to get your ex back at HelpGettingBackTogether.com

We all know the effect alcohol can have on someone...you lose your inhibition...and quite often lack common sense...especially if you are driven by any frustrating feelings...Drinking because youre having a night out with your friends is one thing...but to try to drink in hope of drinking your problems away...is something you want to avoid at ALL COST...It is counter productive... and you will most likely act or say something stupid

Read the rest...
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The Best Relationship Quotes I Know

I love reading relationship quotes and today I thought I would share a couple of my favorite ones with you. Where possible, proper credit has been given to the person who wrote or spoke the original quote. However in some cases that may not have been possible.
You know love funny quotes as I believe humour is a key ingredient in a great relationship. Some of the funny ones I like are:
"What can you say to a man who has just had sex?  Anything you like as he is asleep".
Or for those male readers - "what is the difference between a terrorist and a woman with PMS?" "You can negotiate with a terrorist!"
Joking aside, this quote credited to Leo Buscaglia should be in all couple’s homes. 
“Too often we under estimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around”.
As most of us know it is the little things in a relationship that can cause it to fail or blossom. It is easy to blame the other person in our relationship for our dissatisfaction but as Martha Washington said “I have learned from experience that a greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances.”
Some relationship quotations are beautiful and sad at the same time.  Such as the one from William Somerset Maugham (an English Writer) on unrequited love being "The love that lasts the longest is the love that is never returned."
While I dont think Colin Powell was talking about relationships when he said "None of us can change our yesterdays, but we can all change our tomorrows", it is one that we could all do with remembering. Too often we waste time and energy holding grudges against our partners for something they did in the past. It is too late to change it now so let it go once and for all. So long as it isnt a pattern of repeated behaviour it doesnt do anyone any good to remember it.
"Alone we can do so little, together we can do so much " Helen Keller. This lady was my idol when I was growing up. Despite being born blind and mute she achieved so much more than the rest of us often do. I believe that being part of a couple and then a family gives us the chance to be so much more. We need to appreciate the gifts we have. Our relationships would be a lot happier if we said thank you and I love you just a little more often.
As Mother Theresa is quoted as saying "There is more hunger for love and appreciation in the world today than for bread".  Make sure your loved one knows how much you love and appreciate them today, to avoid a day when you wished you had listened to the relationship quotes.
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Want My Wife Back I Screwed Up

Well, you blew it and now you are crying, “I want my wife back!” Was it something dumb that you did or kept doing? You probably had it coming, then. You dug your hole and now youre stuck in it. So are you going to just stay in that hole or are you going to try and climb out of it? If you are serious when you say, “I want my wife back” then you better get climbing.

Those who "want my wife back” need to know this word: HUMILITY. You better believe that it is going to take some crawling and some begging if you are going to get her back. You cant start feeling that you are too good to come back to her on your knees. If she is still mad at you, you probably deserve it.

The first thing you need to do is admit that you messed up. Dont make excuses for it and dont try to cover it up. If she starts telling you how bad it is, you have to agree with it. This is no time to try and defend what you did. Dont lie about it, you have to be honest. Lying will only get you in more trouble. Also, dont try and gloss over it saying it wasnt that big of a deal. If it cost you your marriage, then obviously it was a big deal.
The second thing that you are going to have to do is not just tell her that you are going to better. You may have tried that before but didnt get better. You have to make her believe it. It will take more than words to get her to believe it. If there is something that you did that you should stop doing then you probably need to take steps to stop it.

For those of you that have a problem with drugs or alcohol, you better go and get some help. You should be working on that before you start telling her that you are trying to change. If it has to do with anger issues, get enrolled in anger management classes and start taking them. Whatever problem it is she says you have, you better be making steps to get it corrected. If you really want get your ex back, you better get serious about making those changes.

You may find this to be a lot of work and that is because it is hard work. You may think that you are just fine the way you are but “the way you are” caused the breakup to happen in the first place. The way you were wasnt good enough.

Your pride may cause you to believe that you are too good to do a lot of the above but to get your wife back you need to lose your pride and learn a lot of humility. You cant let your pride get in the way of doing what you need to do to when you “want my wife back”.
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Can I Get My Ex To Love Me Again Yes I Can

So youre now single or with someone new. . .but you cant get your ex out of your mind. Youre always thinking "How can I get my ex to love me again. . ." And then you probably push the thought away because it seems impossible. The good news is that you can get your ex back in your arms. It has been done before, and not infrequently, and it can be done again, by you.

Men and women get out of relationships for different reasons, many of which are not understood by the opposite sex because mens and womens brains are wired differently. This makes things even more confusing. Some situations seem to be pretty straight-forward but most arent.

So before we tackle your goal of getting your ex back, lets take a look at why he or she isnt around in the first place.

Why do men leave relationships? Its pretty simple, really. They leave when they arent getting what they need. And one sure thing that they need is admiration and respect. It might be for that reason that they they left . . .and maybe they found it somewhere else. One of the most common reasons men give for leaving their wife or girlfriend is “No matter what I did, I couldn’t make her happy!”

Why do women leave relationships? They leave because they feel unappreciated and/or they leave because they are bored. What do you commonly hear from unhappy women? “He doesn’t appreciate a thing I do!”
Now, you might think that your exs reasons for leaving dont fit into one of those categories. You may be thinking, "my husband left me because I cheated on him." But why did you cheat on him in the first place? It probably has something to do with the fact that you werent getting the attention and appreciation you needed. Or maybe youre thinking. . .although thats not an excuse. Or maybe youre thinking "My girlfriend left me because I was never around." But ask yourself, why were you never around?

Now that youre not in continuous contact with your ex, you can take time to look at things more objectively. Use this time constructively to list all the positive and negative factors in your relationship. In the meantime, make sure you take care of yourself, eat healthy foods and exercise when possible.

Then, after youve had time to concentrate on yourself and look at your relationship with more objective eyes, you can think about making that first contact with your ex. Ask him or her out for coffee in a nonchalant manner. If he or she says yes, go out, talk about light non-threatening subjects and keep it short. At the end of the date, dont re-schedule another unless your ex suggests it. So, in answer to your question "Can I get my ex to love me again?" Yes, you can!

The date may go well, the date may go ok or the date may go terribly. In the last case, youll need to re-evaluate your situation and see if you want to continue trying later on or if you need to think about moving on.
But if the date goes well, you will see how the answer to "Can I Get My Ex to Love Me Again?" is "Yes, I can!"
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What Can I Do To Save My Marriage You Ask

If youre looking around wondering “what can I do to save my marriage” then youre no doubt in a dire situation as your marriage has hit rocky ground.
Without a doubt there needs to be a period of reflection before you can launch into a plan to answer your search, “what can I do to save my marriage?”  Failure to stop and think and map out a plan means that you might very well end up going down dead ends and around and around in circles.  So reflect and get a plan.
If you havent already done so, you should talk to your spouse.  Find out what they think of the situation and if they believe there is anything worth saving of the marriage.  With any luck you both agree that you both want to save your marriage and you decide to go forward together.
You are then faced with either trying to figure things out on your own, going for marriage counseling or searching online for one of the many ebooks that are available and that will answer your question “what can I do to save my marriage?”
If you opt for marriage counseling you should consider that this process can be long, expensive and you really have to be prepared to open yourself and your marriage up to an outside third party.  Not only that, you have to be lucky enough to find a therapist who will gel with you and your spouse in order for the process to work really well.
You could both try to work things out between on your own and sometimes this can work really well.  However, you should be aware that you do run the risk of making things worse because you might not be entirely sure what youre doing or how to go about it.  Not only that, you and your spouse will naturally take your corners and hold onto positions that you have, whether they are right or they are wrong.  Its human nature to protect yourself and that might not always be the right way for you to go forward to find ways “to save my marriage.”
The other alternative is to use one of the many ebooks that are online.  This can really be a break through choice for a lot of couples because it usually involves going at your own pace, paying a one off fee and getting step by step practical guidance about how to really save the marriage.
Without a doubt it is always easier to have your spouse on side and the two of you rooting for the marriage, but choosing the right resource to save the union is also crucial!
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I Want My Wife To Love Me Again

Are you unable to think about anything except "I want my wife to love me again"? Has your marriage gone by the wayside and you dont know why or what to do about it? Here are some tips that can help you out.
If you dont know why your wife has stopped loving you (or so she says), then thats the first thing you need to figure out. First of all, if your wife is still with you, then she probably does still love you. If she didnt, she would be somewhere else. So thats something positive you want to keep in mind. So why is she saying that she doesnt love you or just acting like she doesnt love you?
The main reason that a woman will feel like shes fallen out of love is because she isnt getting the attention and appreciation that she craves. Women are multi-faceted and do many things for you and your family. They work, take care of the kids, do all the household duties, have a social life that includes other friends and families and other interests that you both may not share.
So, ask yourself, do you appreciate everything your wife does for you? Do you apprecitate that she is her own person and has her own ideas and interests, not all of which will be the same as yours. Do you appreciate all the little things she does to show you she cares? If so, then you need to let her know if you havent already.
On the other hand, there is such a thing as overdoing it. You dont want to be fawning all over your wife and constantly asking her whats wrong and how you can help her or make her feel more loved. If youve been doing that and its just making her push you away even more, then its time to stop. Dont be negative or hostile about it. continue to be positive and cheerful.
But just give her space. Focus on taking care of yourself. Make sure youre eating right, exercising and going out with friends. Take the kids out on your own and leave your wife some time to herself. You can still offer comments up like "Boy, you sure do look nice today" but leave it at that. Then walk out the door and go to work.
Once you step back a bit and give your wife some space, as well as focus on yourself and show her that you are not going to dye without her, she will start to see you as someone that is to be admired and appreciated as well. Take it slow and let her make the first move towards you again. Hopefully this has helped you take some of the mystery and pain out of the statement "I want my wife to love me again."
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What Is The Best Way To Get A Woman Back

Few things in life suck as much as losing someone you love.  Its very hard to deal with and many people will do just about anything to find out the best way to  get a woman back.  If you want to get back with your ex, dont give up. It is possible and Ill show you how.
In order to get back with your ex youre going to need to think outside the box.  When most people are trying to get back with their ex they almost always do the wrong things.
That is why listening to your friends might be the worst thing you can do because chances are theyll tell you to do the exact opposite of what you should really be doing.
Here is a list of some Dos and Donts.  Follow this list and you will have a much better chance of getting back with your ex.
DONT S
1) Harass, badger, nag, or threaten.  No one likes to be pushed.  Dont chase after her.  She already gets the fact that you still care and you want her back, now its time to back off a little bit and give her some space. 
2) Lock yourself in your house and never go out.  This is what many people do.  They go to work but other than that they just hide in a dark room. 
3) Hookup with someone else.  Not only is this a good way to lose your girlfriend for good, its also unfair to the new woman.  You would just be using her to get over your hurt. 

DOS
1) Give your woman some space.  Give her time to miss you.  She cant remember you fondly and miss you if you are constantly in her face.  This can be very difficult to do but its one of the most important things to remember if you want her back.
2)  Go out with your friends.  Try to have fun.  It will be hard, but its very important not only for your mental health but also so that your ex will start to see you, again, as a fun loving person.  The way she saw you when you first got together.
3) Be honest about whether or not the relationship is worth saving.  Not all relationships should be saved.  Also be willing to honestly admit whatever part you had in the relationship falling apart and be willing to make some changes to your behavior.
Follow the steps Ive listed above and youll be much more likely to get a woman back.
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What Can I do To Get My Ex Girlfriend Back

Most people find themselves asking "What can I do to get my ex girlfriend back" following a breakup. They begin to start thinking and philosophizing about everything that could have been done differently. They even begin to make plans about apology letters and other things that might be able to help them score their relationship back.

This tends to be a dead end for one reason above all else: Because you can never really tell what the real reasons were behind a breakup. Women become emotional and sometimes they do not even know what led to the break up at hand and they may not know what is making them feel the way they do. In many circumstances it is only harmful to lose all your energy trying to figure out what went wrong.

The first main strategy to answer the question about "what can I do to get my ex girlfriend back" is to forget about the relationship for a while, putting your energy into something else. Go out, make friends, have fun, network, and forget about women in general. Set some realistic goals about expanding your repertoire when it comes to seduction and meeting people.

Give yourself a couple of months and make changes in your life. Take some time away from your ex and it will work wonders.

The effect that strategies like this will have, is that it will allow you to make gradual changes in your life. And in how you perceive the subject of relationships. After a few months, you may have a much better idea of how you want to proceed with your ex.

Do you still want to get back together with her? Or are you ready to move on? Act accordingly. If you still want to get back together with her, it might be time to figure out how she is feeling about you.
Now is your chance to be a little more direct when it comes to getting your ex girlfriend back. You need to play strategically, however. Do not simply get your ex back to be with you, because this is not a good time to be emotional.

Instead, what you should be doing is playing things cool with your ex. If you have spent enough time apart from her, she is probably missing you as badly as you are missing her. Play hard to get a little (dont over do it) and show her that you are doing fine without her. This will inspire her to really rethink things.
And if getting back together with your ex really is meant to be,  now is the time when it will become apparent. Be careful not to analyze things too much, because over analyzing may prevent you from acting the right way when trying to figure out "what can I do to get my ex girlfriend back". Just take things slow and play them cool and you should be fine.
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Stop My Divorce

Divorces are at an all time high.  Sometimes it seems that it’s easier to get a divorce than to get married. 
People get hurt in divorce.  The parties are forever scarred.  Children, if there are any, never get over the hurt.  Knowing this, you may be wondering “How do I stop my divorce?”
There are three steps to stopping a divorce. 
The first thing that you have to realize is that saying you’ve changed does not mean you really have changed.  If you are the person who is at fault in the relationship, it’s not enough to give lip service to the idea of change.
If you have been having affairs, for instance, it is going to take time for your partner to believe that you are no longer going back to your wandering ways.  It is not enough to tell your partner that you’re not stepping out anymore.  You will have to take concrete actions.  As an example, you may need to allow your partner to “monitor” your activities by checking in with him or her on a frequent basis.  If your job requires you to travel, you may have to look for a new job that keeps you close to home.
Other things besides affairs can mess up a relationship.  For instance, if the wife’s spending habits are causing money problems which weaken the marriage, she may have to commit to cutting up the credit cards and living on a cash allowance.  If the husband’s work habits keep him away from home too often, he may have to commit to being home by 6:30 every night no matter what.  At the crux of this step is what is the most important thing in your life?  If it is your marriage, you will make the necessary changes.  But don’t just give lip service to them.  Actions speak louder than words.
The next step is to avoid using emotional blackmail if you want to stop your divorce.  Recognize that love is NOT enough to save your marriage.  Telling your partner, “but I love you” in the heat of an argument will not win you any points.  When you say “I love you” at inappropriate times, your partner is forced to say “I love you, BUT…”  this weakens the emotional tie that love has between you.
Use the powerful “I love you” message when your wounds are mended, not at the heat of an argument. 
You can’t use logic or guilt to change your partner’s mind.  Arguing like this will only involve a spiraling argument.  If you feel you must win, then you will lose.  
Finally, don’t think that you can win an argument.  Some people like to use their superior logic or argumentative skills to “prove” they are right and their partner is wrong.  This may work in a formally scored debate, but in a marriage (which is scored on emotions not facts) it’s sure to fail.  Instead of arguing, solve the problem.  If your spouse brings up a fault in you, discuss possible solutions rather than argue back. 
Are you wondering how to “stop my divorce?”  Start by following the “stop my divorce” advice I’ve laid out in this article.
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What Should I Do to Get My Ex Back

When you break up with someone you love, you go through lots of painful emotions.  You feel sad, depressed and hurt, and you miss them.  “What should I do to get my ex back?” becomes a question you constantly ask yourself.
There are many websites, books, blogs, forums and even courses designed to answer the question, what should I do to get my ex back? But common sense can really make a difference after a breakup.  And common courtesy can go long way toward healing your relationship.
If you’re preoccupied with your lost relationship, wondering “what should I do to get my ex back?” then follow this simple advice.  You’ll give yourself the best chance of getting back together with that special someone. 
Don’t play games.  This is very important, but unfortunately many people resort to this during breakups because it gives them a sense of power.  If you can make the other person think that you don’t care, or you care more than you really do, you’re manipulating them and that can feel great.  But it won’t feel great for long.
Eventually you’ll realize that lying and tricking the other person isn’t a good feeling. And anything good that happens because of it will always be sullied a little because of the lie.
Some people play games where they pretend to be dating someone else, or they pretend to be in love with someone else. This is a ploy to make the ex jealous.  While it does work now and then, other times it makes the breakup permanent because it backfires.
Your ex could be so jealous at the thought of you being with someone else that they want you back.  Or they could decide that since you moved on so quickly, you don’t really care about them anyway.  You have no way of knowing which way this ploy will work until it’s too late.
Don’t be mean. This holds true in any situation or any relationship, but sometimes the anger around a breakup makes us act more viciously than we normally might.  Even if you’re hurt, the fact that you want to know, ‘What should I do to get my ex back?” shows that you’re ready to forgive that person.  If you couldn’t, you wouldn’t want your ex back, you’d be glad it was over.
Now, think about how you’ve been acting.  If you were your ex, would you look forward to spending time with you or talking to you?  Or would you dread each time?  Do you shout and nag? Even if you feel like raising all kinds of arguments, simply don’t. Work very hard at controlling your anger and hurt, and being a person they can miss.
“What should I do to get my ex back?” Be on your best behavior and make your ex remember what drew them to you in the first place. They’ll remember your good points and will miss them.  Then you’ll have a better chance of being able to get back together with your ex.
These are just the beginning steps in winning your Ex back. They are the initial steps I followed when I lost the love of my life. And frankly these arent my original ideas. I turned to T Dub Jackson when I had no idea of how to get my true love back.
T Dub authored a simple, down to earth step by step plan called "The Magic Of Making Up". And you know, it worked like magic for us. Now we are more in love than ever.
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What Can I Do To Get My Ex Boyfriend Back

Are you feeling like everything you do pushes your ex away further? Is this describing your situation to a tee? Are you asking "What can I do to get my ex boyfriend back" at every turn? Here are some tips that will greatly improve your chances of getting back together with your ex boyfriend.
Obviously right now you are serious about saving or rekindling your relationship, which is what led you to this article in the first place. But if you are feeling overly anxious to get your ex back, you may be behaving in the wrong way, causing your ex to pull away naturally. It is human nature in general to resist this kind of pressure. Struggling against human nature is completely pointless, and it will only make matters worse.
Are you calling your ex too much, constantly writing him e-mails or text messaging him? Are you trying to make him feel sorry for you? If you are doing these things, stop! If you are asking yourself " What can I do to get my ex boyfriend back", then you need to stop doing these things right now.
So What can I do to get my ex boyfriend back? Follow this strategy instead.
You are going to need to take a completely fresh approach. Begin by breaking contact off for a while, doing your own thing. During this time where there is no communication between you and your ex boyfriend, you can focus on ways that you can improve your own personal life, rather than focusing on the relationship issues at hand. This is going to be a challenging time, and it is going to require discipline to prevent you from returning to your old ways.
During this time, your ex is going to experience a shift in how he feels about you, since you will no longer be pursuing him. You may become mysterious to him in some ways, because he is not sure what you are doing or feeling. This is actually something that can work in your favor. Now your ex is in a position to actually miss you, which is not possible when you are smothering him.
You must remember that the key to this strategy and repairing a break up is to work with human nature rather than attempting to work against it. If you are wondering " What can I do to get my ex boyfriend back", now you should have a fairly basic understanding on how common mistakes can be avoided. Once you implement this basic strategy you can restore a balance and allow your ex to remember why he loved you in the first place.
Just keep yourself grounded and avoid smothering him. Make yourself appear mysterious and he will be reminded why he loved you in the first place. Play hard to get (dont over do it) and let him make the first move, and you will come out on top. And then you will stop asking "What can I do to get my ex boyfriend back"
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Im Still In Love With My Ex

Do you say, “I’m still in love with my ex!” and wonder how you’re going to get through the hours, let alone the next days? It’s common to feel completely overwhelmed after a breakup, especially if you’re not the one what wanted to end it. And if you sit around thinking, “I’m still in love with my ex,” you’re only making it harder on yourself.
Of course, if you’re really in love with your ex you could make an effort to get back together. There’s no guarantee that anything you do will get you back together, but you could still try. Often, being genuine and just making it really clear that you don’t want to lose your ex will be enough to move them to give it another chance.
If cheating was involved in some capacity, then their wanting to come back is less likely, but it’s still possible. If you cheated, you might think it’s going to be harder to get them back.
But if they cheated and that relationship has ended, it’s still harder to get them back once they’ve been with someone else. And it’s going to take a long time for you to start trusting each other again.
It’s important for you to decide that if your ex gives in and comes back, how will you keep from falling into the same patterns the next time around? You can say, “I’m still in love with my ex!” until you’re blue in the face, and that won’t chance whether or not you have problems in the future.
It’s really easy to be in love with someone. But making a relationship work is tough and time consuming. And you have the added difficulty of overcoming a break up. You can try to convince your ex that if you get back together you’ll change your ways, and maybe they’ll believe you.
But the best thing you can do is simply show that you’ve changed your ways, without saying much about it. Actions really do almost always speak much louder than words, so the things you do are going to be noticed more by your ex than the things you say.
It’s important to say the right things, too. But it’s more important to do the right things. If you’re really still in love with them then you should want to change your actions dramatically, at least right now. When you think your actions might make a difference it’s easy to feel like you can change many things about yourself.
What you have to determine is whether or not you can really follow through with it. There’s no point in making promises to your ex that you’re not going to be able to keep.
If you have any doubt that you’ll want to make the changes that you or your ex feel are necessary, then you shouldn’t promise that you’ll make them. Though you say, “I’m still in love with my ex, “ you have to remember than only lasting changes will matter, not just a fast change to win them back.
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Series Communicating with your ex Part 3

The third part in this 3-part series pertains to email communication.

Again, although it addresses divorced parents, the wisdom within applies to anyone in danger of sending an overly-emotional email to an ex.

If youre wanting to get your ex back, you need to be careful how you communicate by email. You want to send an agreeable message, not a confrontational one. -- Kit.

Three Email Communication Mistakes That Will Inflame Conflict Between Divorced Couples

By Mary Wollard

More and more, communication between divorced parents occurs by email. This can be an effective way to reduce conflict between parents. If you commit one or more of these three common email mistakes, however, you might create or heighten conflict. What are these common email communication mistakes, and how you can fix them to reduce conflict with the other parent?

Mistake #1 - USING TOO MANY CAPS

One of the first guidelines of email etiquette is not to type words in all capital letters, because that is akin to shouting. When I first heard that, I didnt really believe it. That was until email became part of my all-day, every-day life, and then I received a message that was written mostly in caps.

It just set me on edge, like fingernails on a blackboard (do people even remember that sound anymore?). After that I started paying closer attention to emails, not just to me, but between my clients.

I found that the use of caps in emails between high-conflict parents triggers anger reactions. The caps dont add anything of substance to the communication and cause the communications to quickly deteriorate. Once the anger kicks in, effective communication really becomes impossible.

If you find yourself moved to use caps in your email, ask yourself what you are trying to achieve. Then, find some other way to communicate that.

Mistake #2 - Sarcasm and humor

When we talk to someone, our words are only a part of the communication. We use hand gestures; raise an eyebrow; make our voice higher or lower, louder or softer; laugh; smile; or frown. All of these things convey our true meaning to the person were talking to.

When you write an email, all of these nuances are gone and you are left only with the raw words of your message. In your own mind, you are often adding all of those hand gestures, facial expressions and intonations. The problem is that the person reading your email cant see into your mind. Sarcasm and humor are both highly dependent on extraneous visual and auditory cues. Since these arent available in writing, your attempts at sarcasm and humor in email will likely fail or be misconstrued.

Those cute little emoticons (the smiling, laughing, winking, or sad faces) people add to their email werent just created by people with way too much time on their hands. They are an effort to show the spirit of the words in the email so the receiver can better understand whats being said. Without something like that, the receiver has no way of knowing your intentions.

If your relationship with the other parent is stressed and full of conflict, your best practice is to leave attempts at sarcasm and humor out of your email.

Mistake #3 - Sending too soon

During a heated exchange, you may type something you would never want someone else to see. When you communicate by email, you are putting your angry thoughts into writing and you make it possible for anyone - including your children - to witness that anger long after youve cooled down.

A good rule of thumb is to pause before you send any message that you feel emotionally charged about. Stand up and walk away from the computer for a few minutes or even a few hours. When you come back, make sure that the message youre sending is something you are ok with being in print.

I cant stress enough the powerful effect communication has on the level of conflict in your relationship with the other parent. Creating healthy new patterns of communication can break the destructive cycle of conflict and allow both parents to focus on building good relationships with their children.

© 2009, Mary Wollard, J.D., Family Solutions Center, LLC


Mary A. Wollard, JD, is an attorney, mediator, and arbitrator with over 20 years experience in solving the legal issues of divorce, parenting (custody), marital property and support. In addition to helping families through mediation and arbitration, Ms. Wollard provides parenting coordination and decision-making services to families when on-going conflict prevents them from fully implementing their parenting plan after divorce. Visit http://www.cofamilysolutions.com/downloads.htm for free downloadable worksheets you can use to organize your familys transition.

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I Want My Husband Back Some Tips For Reconciliation

If you are separated from your husband physically or emotionally, the thought of the failure of your relationship can be unbearable. You do not want to give up on your marriage, so all you think is I want my husband back. Depending on the extent of the problems between the two of you, reconciliation can be difficult but not impossible.
You may have tried everything that you can think of to get him back to no avail.  Here are some other ideas to consider to help you reach your goal of reconciliation.
1. Give him some space.  Some men feel limited in their marriage, like they are boxed in. The more limitations he feels are placed on him may make him distant and emotionally unavailable due to this feeling.  By having a little freedom to tinker in the garage, watch sports or hang out with the guys on a regular basis, your husband will appreciate it and enjoy the time he spends with you and your family more.
2. Limit contact. If you are separated from your husband, keep your contact with him to a minimum. This is important because it will give him a chance to work through his feelings of the separation. While your separation has been very upsetting to you, it can be just as upsetting to him. You may be thinking I want my husband back so I need to talk to him and reason with him to pull your marriage together, but constant contact could prove to be more divisive than helpful. By limiting contact, you give both of you the time you need to step back and look at your situation objectively and make positive changes that can bring you together again.
3. Be introspective. Regardless of who is at fault for the problems in your marriage, both of you need to work together to mend your relationship. Be objective and take a look at your faults. Think about what you can do or changes you can make that can bring you together. This can involve being a better listener, nagging less or showing your husband more attention.
4. Set priorities. Your relationship with your husband may have deteriorated due to your work or other commitments outside of your home. Find ways to make time for your husband and show him how important he is to you. It is also important for him to do the same for you. As determined as you may to get your husband back, unless you both work towards a resolution it will not happen.
5. Listen. When he is ready to talk, make sure that you listen to everything he has to say as objectively as possible. Address any questions he has directly and communicate your feelings clearly to him. Have an honest discussion with him and make sure that he feels that he is heard and understood. This is an emotional situation that you are in, however be as calm as possible as getting upset will not be helpful. 
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