Series Communicating with your ex Part 1

Ive been thinking lately about how people communicate with their exes.

For the most part, people dont. Exceptions are when they work together, have classes together, go to church together, etc.

Another exception is when one of the partners wants to get back together. Usually, if someone wants to get an ex back, there will be communication. In fact, there may be all too much communication.

The last exception arises when a couple has children. Here is an article I found, about communicating in that situation. -- Kit.

Communicating With Your Ex - Letting Go of the Last Word

By Mary Wollard

You probably all have someone in your family who has to have the last word in any discussion or argument. Maybe your whole family is like this, making family get-togethers challenging at best. In the case of email, this can lead to back-and-forth messages that belabor a subject way longer than necessary, with each new message escalating the conflict higher and higher.

If you are someone who needs to have the last word and your communications with your ex are difficult, be aware that this is only adding to the conflict. It will take great restraint on your part to break the pattern. After all, it took a long time to cultivate the need to have the last word and it will take a long time to feel comfortable not having the last word. The only way to break the cycle is to just resist the urge to say one more thing.

Start with a conversation that you feel neutral about, and just try not responding to the last thing the other person said. As you become more comfortable with this in relatively unimportant conversations, then you can move on to practicing in areas that are more important. Work slowly, but work at it constantly. It will be hard work because this is a very hard habit to break, but the rewards will be great.

If it is the other parent who needs the last word, know that it is not a sign of weakness on your part to let him or her have it. Know that this communication pattern in the other person started way before you ever came into the picture and likely affects every relationship they have. But you can still take responsibility for your part in these never-ending discussions.

Even if the other person hasnt yet done the work necessary to end this communication merry-go-round, you can. If you follow the steps above, the cycle will stop. Start with a subject that is not highly charged, and just let the conversation go when you have said what you have to say.

The important thing is to make the decision to break this communication cycle. If you do, I guarantee you will feel more powerful in the relationship, not less powerful.

© 2009, Mary Wollard, J.D., Family Solutions Center, LLC

Mary A. Wollard, JD, is an attorney, mediator, and arbitrator with over 20 years experience in solving the legal issues of divorce, parenting (custody), marital property and support. In addition to helping families through mediation and arbitration, Ms. Wollard provides parenting coordination and decision-making services to families when on-going conflict prevents them from fully implementing their parenting plan after divorce. Visit http://www.cofamilysolutions.com/downloads.htm for free downloadable worksheets you can use to organize your familys transition.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Mary_Wollard
http://EzineArticles.com/?Communicating-With-Your-Ex---Letting-Go-of-the-Last-Word&id=2193378

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Series continues with Part 2 and Part 3.
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My Boyfriend Dumped Me Picking Myself Back Up

“I feel like dying because my boyfriend dumped me!” It isnt the end of the world and it isnt even close. Even though it hurts, it isnt going to kill you. This is something that you can and will get over. It will take some work, some help, some readjusting in the way you think, and some time. Be sure that just because you are upset that “my boyfriend dumped me” doesnt mean that life stops, life goes on. Be ready for it.

Getting past the idea that “my boyfriend dumped me” isnt going to be easy but it also isnt going to be impossible. You are going to have to pick yourself up and dust yourself off and move along. The alternative means that you will be stuck wallowing in your own misery. If that is no life that you want to have then do what it takes to get out of it. It takes work to climb back out of the pit but the work is worth it.

Dont be afraid to ask for help but be careful where it is that you ask for it. If you are battling depression because of it, seek professional help. This doesnt mean that you are going crazy, depression is something that many people deal with so dont worry about people judging you. Do try to beat it, though.

It may be, though, that you have good friends or family that can help you out while you are trying to deal with that fact that “my boyfriend dumped me.” Be careful to not lay too much on these people, though, and when you ask for advice, follow it. If you are constantly complaining about your life and the situation but arent following up on what advice is given, they are going to reach a point that you dont want. They are going to get tired of you and cut you off or seriously consider it.

You should also re-frame the way you look at the situation. Try looking at it from a different angle or perspective. While you may see it as the end of the world, from another persons perspective, it may not be. Try to find that other persons perspective. Try to see what good it is that you have to offer someone. What are your best qualities? For sure there is going to be someone out there who will appreciate them. Wait for them to come along.

While you are waiting, find some way to improve yourself. Find something that you have long dreamed about doing and throw your life into it. If there is something non-romantic that you have longed to achieve in life, pursue it. Do you want to make yourself better in anyway, now is the time to do it. Try to find someway to use this time and that negative energy you have and do something positive with it.

The end result will be a happier you. Once you have found that happiness, it will become magnetic and draw in the person that you dream of, the one that makes you smile and makes you feel like you belong. It will make you look back on this dark time in your life when you were crying because “my boyfriend dumped me” and see it as one of the best things that ever happened to you.
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I Want My Wife Back 3 Tips

If you’re saying, “I want my wife back,” but you’re unsure where to start, there are some easy things you can do to make it possible. While no one tip or set of tips are going to guarantee that you’ll get your wife back, some things do work better than others. Soon you may not be saying, “I want my wife back,” but “why didn’t I do these things years ago?”
Being extra nice and polite is the first thing you have to do. That sounds ridiculously simple, doesn’t it? But when we’re with someone for a while, we tend to take them for granted. And if right now you’re saying, “I want my wife back” then this applies to you.
No matter what happens, you need to be on an even keel, nice and polite. Unfortunately, it’s easier to be nice and polite when you’re still together because you see her more often. But it is possible to run into someone often “accidentally on-purpose,” especially if you live in a small town or are part of a close-knit community.
Run into her often and use every moment you’re near her as an opportunity to show her that you can be considerate and polite. The important thing is to avoid things like getting angry or impatient with her.
Sometimes this is a difficult thing to judge. You might think your wife wants you to be jealous. Or you might think the whole breakup is a ploy to get you to act differently. If you keep thinking of the breakup along those terms, you’re in for a disappointment.
Sometimes people do break up with someone to prove a point and to get their lover to come around to their way of thinking. But most often it’s not a game, and the person left because they were unhappy with you and the relationship.
If you’re saying, “I want my wife back!” and you’re trying to convince yourself that she didn’t really intend to leave you, but instead meant get a rise out of you, stop thinking that way now.
You simply shouldn’t presume to know something that could be completely wrong. So assume that she had reasons that were good enough for her. And show her that there’s more to you than meets the eye.
So from being nice and polite, we move into being thoughtful. They are different things, though they’re overlapping, too. Being nice and polite can apply to everyday situations. Being thoughtful means going that extra mile.
Try sending her a card telling her she’s special. Send it for no real reason, no occasion, except to remind her that you think she’s special. Surprise her in a way you probably rarely did when you were together, and reap the rewards.
Finally, be thoughtful enough to leave her alone. You might think, “I want my wife back,” but if she’s not ready to try and you keep hounding her on the issue, you’ll only drive her further away.
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Women Men Love And Women Men Leave

There are two types of women in the world, women men love women men leave.  Which one are you?  It doesnt really matter which side you fall on at this point, if you read and use the information in this article you can become the women men love for the rest of your life.
The first step to make sure your man will love you the way you want to be loved, is to know what it is your man needs in the relationship and then give it to him.  This seemingly simple thing is messed up more often than you would believe.  Many women will think this means to be completely subservient to their man and do whatever he wants even if she doesnt want to do it.
Nothing could be further from the truth.  In reality no man (unless hes "damaged goods" which you wouldnt want to be in a relationship with anyway) wants a women who is a door mat.  A real man will like his women to have a mind of her own, but he also wants her to be his biggest fan.
Women tend to think that if they give their man all the sex he wants, and if they dress up in sexy lingerie they are meeting all their mans needs.  Again, if that is truly all your man needs you might want to find a man with a little more depth.  Its a misconception that all men want is sex.  Yes, sex is an important part of a relationship, for men and women, but it shouldnt be the do all, end all in any relationship, if it is your relationship will fail, its just a matter of time.
In order to really form a long lasting bond you need to base  your relationship on more than just physical intimacy.  Whether we like it or not, we will all get older and as we do sex will become more difficult for various physical reasons. If your whole relationship is just based on physical intimacy, how can it survive once that is taken out of the equation?
The women that men leave, believe it or not,  are the women who try too hard to be whatever he wants. Your man needs to feel special and loved, admired, and desired, but it wont mean very much to him if it doesnt seem sincere.  If he feels like you are just being pliable he will quickly get bored and move on to someone more real. 
So for all you women out there, you do have a choice.  You can be either type of women:  women men love women men leave.  Its entirely up to you.  It doesnt mean giving up your own identity, it just means trying to understand your man and what he really wants and needs from you.
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My Boyfriend Dumped Me What To Do Next

If youre thinking, "My boyfriend dumped me. Now what do I do?" youre not alone. Millions of people have been in the same position you are right now. Things do get better, whether you get back together with your boyfriend or not. But if youre despairing, "My boyfriend dumped me!" then you need to have a good cry and then get yourself together.

You probably want to get your ex back. While there are no guarantees that youll be able to get back together, there are some things you can do that will help. The first thing is to realize that people get dumped every day for a number of different reasons. And the one you think caused your breakup might not be the real reason.

You have stop assuming and stop telling people, "My boyfriend dumped me because of—“, fill in the blank, if youre not exactly sure thats why he dumped you. How do you know for sure why you were dumped? You have to ask, if you really want to know.

Be sure and only ask if you think you can take the truth, though. If asking could cause him to tell you something that youve suspected but have been in denial about, for instance, will it cause you more pain to find out than to not know? Maybe you should just let the past stay there, and work on the future, in that case.
But if you need to know—and you might if you really want to work things out—then youll have to ask. Try not arguing with the answer you get when you ask. Just accept that "my boyfriend dumped me because of this," and move on.

The next step is to simply ask if he thinks theres a chance. If the reason he broke up with you is something you believe you can fix, then you should make that clear to him. Let him know youre willing to work on these things because you believe that you have something special and you want to make it work
It might really be hard to do these things. Being dumped hurts. But if you want to get back together and make your relationship work, then there has to be honest communication going on between you. And the worst thing that can happen is that things arent going to work out.

If thats the case and theres no chance of you getting back together despite any efforts you might put forth, then at least you made the effort and probably learned something about yourself.

Examine the reasons he broke up with you and you might decide that its not really a bad thing. Even if you know youre better off, it feels crummy to get dumped. Be nice to yourself and treat yourself to a facial or a pedicure.

And try to remember that "My boyfriend dumped me!" is something that many others have had to deal with, and they made things work out, so you can too.
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The Best Relationship Quotes I Know

I love reading relationship quotes and today I thought I would share a couple of my favorite ones with you. Where possible, proper credit has been given to the person who wrote or spoke the original quote. However in some cases that may not have been possible.
You know love funny quotes as I believe humour is a key ingredient in a great relationship. Some of the funny ones I like are:
"What can you say to a man who has just had sex?  Anything you like as he is asleep".
Or for those male readers - "what is the difference between a terrorist and a woman with PMS?" "You can negotiate with a terrorist!"
Joking aside, this quote credited to Leo Buscaglia should be in all couple’s homes. 
“Too often we under estimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around”.
As most of us know it is the little things in a relationship that can cause it to fail or blossom. It is easy to blame the other person in our relationship for our dissatisfaction but as Martha Washington said “I have learned from experience that a greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances.”
Some relationship quotations are beautiful and sad at the same time.  Such as the one from William Somerset Maugham (an English Writer) on unrequited love being "The love that lasts the longest is the love that is never returned."
While I dont think Colin Powell was talking about relationships when he said "None of us can change our yesterdays, but we can all change our tomorrows", it is one that we could all do with remembering. Too often we waste time and energy holding grudges against our partners for something they did in the past. It is too late to change it now so let it go once and for all. So long as it isnt a pattern of repeated behaviour it doesnt do anyone any good to remember it.
"Alone we can do so little, together we can do so much " Helen Keller. This lady was my idol when I was growing up. Despite being born blind and mute she achieved so much more than the rest of us often do. I believe that being part of a couple and then a family gives us the chance to be so much more. We need to appreciate the gifts we have. Our relationships would be a lot happier if we said thank you and I love you just a little more often.
As Mother Theresa is quoted as saying "There is more hunger for love and appreciation in the world today than for bread".  Make sure your loved one knows how much you love and appreciate them today, to avoid a day when you wished you had listened to the relationship quotes.
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Love Relationship Advice

For most people, its pretty easy to find love.  The challenge often seems to be to be able to make it last.  Keeping your love for each other strong is not impossible.  You just have to understand why it falls apart and make sure you, and your partner, avoid those traps.  Thats where love relationship advice comes in handy.
With the advent of online dating sites there are more ways than ever to meet the one.  Its a much better method than cruising the bar scene looking for someone special.  For most couples the first few months is pretty easy.  You are falling in love and you think the other person is perfect.  You can see no wrong in them or what they do.  And maybe there isnt anything wrong with the way they, or you, act in the early stages of a relationship.
They say that familiarity breeds contempt and if thats true it would go a long way to explaining why the longer a relationship goes on the more it tends to break down.
Here is a list of some of the things you, and your partner, need to be on the lookout for in your relationship.  These are common traps that many couples fall into without realizing it.  If you know what to watch out for and can avoid these mistakes you will have a much better chance of keeping your relationship strong and healthy for a long time:
1. Unrealistic expectations.  As I said above we think our new love can do no wrong.  As our relationship slowly changes from falling in love to being in love and all the day to day stresses and mundane tasks we must face, its easy to lose some of that early glow.  This can be a pivotal time in many relationships, sometimes the couple will think that they just dont love each other anymore and break up.
In reality, in any long term relationship, you will spend a much longer time in this normal mode than you will in the early glow mode.  Its important to recognize that this is all a normal progression in an adult relationship.
2. Inability to effectively communicate.  Men and women express themselves differently...thats just the way it is.  The good news is that you can learn to communicate with your partner effectively, if youre willing to take some time to learn how. The whole its a guy thing or its a girl thing is only true to a point, and is largely just a cop out.  In reality any mature, intelligent adult should be able to learn how to talk to their partner, and even more importantly, listen to their partner.  The real question is do you care enough about your partner and the relationship to take the time?
3.  Dont confuse sex with love.  This may sound obvious but men and women tend to look at sex in different ways.  Women, for example, tend to look at sex as a way to connect with someone they love on a deeper physical level.  Yes, its pleasurable, but the pleasure isnt just physical its emotional as well.
Men tend to look at sex as definition of who they are as a man.  For them too, its pleasurable but its also a way to prove their desirability and masculinity.  Sometimes when a relationship gets to the comfortable stage this difference in views about sex can create problems.  If one partner doesnt seem sexually interested in the other partner it can create severe stress on the relationship.
If your relationship gets to this point, it might help if you and your partner can remember that sex is only one small component of every thing your relationship is made up of.  While for many couples, having an active sex life is an important part of the relationship, its important to understand that as you age and your relationship grows, it probably wont be  quite as important as it once was. That doesnt mean your partner doesnt love you or find you attractive, its just a fairly common way for long term relationships to go.
I hope this love relationship advice will help you hold on to the love youve found.  Being able to make a deep, long lasting, connection with another person really is one of lifes blessings.  Make your connection last by learning how to avoid the pitfalls of some relationships.
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Win Love Back Make Your Ex Love You Again

Have you recently experienced a breakup, and now you are hoping that you can win love back?

Getting your ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend to fall madly in love with you once again is an endeavor that can be quite difficult. However, if you want to get your ex back, and you have the dedication and the patience to achieve it, you may be able to make it happen.

The first thing you need to do in order to win love back is to figure out what went wrong in the relationship in the first place. What did you do, or what did your ex do, in order to make the relationship dissolve?
You need to be able to address the problems in the relationship in order to win love back.

If you cannot rectify the issues that led to the breakup, then you are not going to be able to win love and get your ex back back when it comes to your relationship.

If you want to win back his heart, then you are going to have to proceed slowly but surely. If you messed up and did something wrong and that led to the dissolving of your relationship, then what you need to do is apologize, and work to regain the trust of your ex.

Are you certain that you want to win love back in the first place? Do you want your ex back or are you simply afraid to be alone? What is going to keep you from messing things up again? Are you dedicated to repairing the relationship once and for all, or might you slip up again?

If you are sure that you want to rekindle things, and you are sure that your goal is to win love back, then you need to let him know by apologizing for the problems in the past, communicating better with him than ever before, and giving him the space that he needs to figure out what he wants to do in the relationship. If you do not give him any space, the results of the relationship will not be to your liking.

Find out what it is that caused the relationship to fall apart, and fix it. If he was bored with you, find a way to liven things up. If you cheated on him, find a way to prove that youve stopped. Once you can undo the underlying causes of the break up, you and your ex can start learning to rebuild things in a healthy and proactive way and this will allow you to win love back once and for all.

Learning how to win love back and get your ex back is all about knowing what went wrong the first time around so that you can prevent it from happening again. It may take some serious time and effort, but the investment is well worthwhile when you consider the positive results that are possible in situations like these.
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How To Win Love Back

Its easy to fall into routines and habits in relationships where we all end up taking what we have for granted. We simply expect the other person to be there until one day the relationship comes crumbling down around you. Fortunately learning how to win love back is easier than most people believe.

The problem with most how to win love back tactics is that they dont take into consideration the primary differences between the way men and women think. Women will try very hard to make their man understand how much they love him and need him, while men view actions as speaking louder than any words you can say.

If youre serious about learning how to win love and get your ex back, then youll need to spend a bit of time removing the words from your relationships memories and taking a look at what your actions were saying.

Most women can think of times when they were trying hard to tell their man that they love him and want him to stay. You know the words you said, but what did your actions say? To a man, you would have been showing him how upset you were and how hurt you were. In his mind, he would have been thinking that hes the cause of all your misery, so youd be better off if he just broke up with you.  This means all your reassurances of how much you love him actually pushed him away!

Think about all the times where you both argued and got angry. Your words might have been trying to make him see reason and understand your point of view, but your actions were telling him something very different. Your man wouldnt have heard the words you shouted at him. He would only have seen a very unhappy woman who really wasnt happy with the man before her. His mind would instantly have thought he was the cause of your misery and hes believe its easier to break up with you rather than keep making you so unhappy. The same thing is true if you give him the silent treatment.

When youre learning how to win back love, you have to realize that your actions will speak far louder than any words you can say. Your partner wants you to be happy. He also wants to believe youre happy when youre spending time with him. The best possible way to show him that hes the right man for you is to go out and work on your own self-confidence levels.

When you feel happy within yourself and youre confident and brimming with life, youre irresistible to the man who fell in love with you. After all, when the relationship was still new and exciting, you were both bubbly and happy and pleased to spend time with each other. This is the version of you your partner fell in love with.

Spend some time working on things that make you happy. Hang out with friends or take a walk to clear your unhappy thoughts. Watch a fun movie and then suggest that you catch up with your man over a friendly cup of coffee. Your actions will show that youre a more pleasant person to be with and his feelings will start to re-kindle as though by magic.
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Love To Get Your Ex Wife Back

If your goal is to get your ex wife back then you have to admit something that you may not want to. You may have to admit you’re weak. Will you have to admit it to her? That depends on how she views you at the moment, how you have come across in the past and how she will view you in the future. The trick to get your ex wife back is to let her know that you have changed and that you are, can be, and will be the one that she wants.

Wanting to get your ex wife back is admitting that you are weak. You are admitting that you need her and are incomplete with out here. You are admitting that you have to have her in order for life to make sense and/or work. Once you make the effort, she is going to be figuring that out on her own. Just making the effort to get your ex wife back is proof of that. How did she view you prior to the break up? Did you divorce because you were seen as being weak? Hopefully that is not the case. If so, coming back and trying to reconcile after the divorce or break up may be seen as groveling back and may not be something that she wants to see from her man.

If, though, you were seen as being particularly hard headed and self-absorbed then you are essentially saying that you were wrong. This is not a bad thing. When you show that you can admit that you were wrong shows that you are willing to admit that you are human. Being wrong is weak but admitting it and trying to correct it takes immense strength. Letting down your guard and telling the her that you were wrong shows that you are serious about wanting to get your ex wife back. Even though it’s admitting that you are weak, it is showing that you are strong enough to deal with it.

When you are trying to win your ex wife back, you have to know that you are putting your future in someone else’s hands. The results are far from certain. The truth is the damage may already be done and it has reached the point of no return. Does this mean that you shouldn’t try? No. It does mean that everything that you do has to be above and beyond any reasonable doubt that she might have. This will mean being honest in not just admitting how wrong you may have been but honest in really trying to change.

If you go back to your ex wife and try to convince her that you have changed and that you are worth the risk, you have to be honest. If you aren’t and you aren’t willing to follow through on your commitment to be better thing swill only fall apart again. If you are going to go through with the effort to get your ex wife back, make sure that the change in you is real.
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How To Save My Marriage

Do you wonder “how to save my marriage?”  This article tells you how to save your marriage.
First, you need to identify the trouble in your relationship.  Some common troubles include:
· Money concerns
· Child rearing difficulties
· Lack of sex
· Lack of communication
· Loss of identity
And, of course, there are many others.  You may discover that there is one main problem or you may identify several smaller problems that are eating away at your marriage. 
When you identify the problem or problems that are at the root of your marriage troubles, you will be able to move on to the next step which is close, personal interaction.
In this step, you will need to be open to extensive conversation.  If you have not had a lot of open communication during your marriage, you may want to consider counseling in order to facilitate the personal interaction that is key to this step. 
If you really want to save your marriage, you will set aside time to work on your marriage issues every single day.  You could set aside some time like after the children go to bed or you could decide to take a walk after dinner every day for just the two of you.  But, you should plan to get back in touch with each other.  A daily habit of quality time with your spouse is very important.
Take some “romantic time” each week.  For some couples, this means reinstating a “date night” every week.  On Tuesdays, for instance, you get a sitter and go out for a picnic or walk around the mall.  As you can see, this doesn’t have to involve wine and roses every week, but a romantic time that you can look forward to all week is essential.
As you spend time together being romantic and discussing your problems, you must have an open mind toward what your partner is telling you.  You need to understand that a lot of the problems in your marriage are caused by – get this – you!  Until you really listen to your partner, you are not going to be able to effect the kind of personal change necessary to save your marriage.
You need to have faith in your partner.  You need to give him or her the benefit of the doubt.  You need to believe that the marriage still can and will work.  You also need to believe that your partner is still essentially the same person he or she was when you married them.  If you cannot have faith in your partner and in your marriage, you might as well give up now.
Finally, you have to be open to forgiveness.  If your partner has made mistakes – even major ones – you must be able to forgive.  If you insist that there are things that cannot be forgiven, there is no hope for your marriage. 
Everyone makes mistakes.  Some people make big mistakes.  If that person makes a genuine apology – which includes acts of contrition and an effort to change – they deserve forgiveness.
This article gave you answers to that perplexing question, “how to save my marriage.”
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About Depression

By John James

The natural ways to treat depression are much cheaper than prescription drugs and are also considered to be efficient. These include practice, meditation, sleep, NLP and hypnosis also as having a balanced diet.

Exercise is one of the good ways to treat depression because it acts as a mood booster and is believed to be better than prescription medications in preventing the recurrence of mild to moderate depression.

These natural ways to treat depression are more preferred by a good deal of over prescription drugs because antidepressants and sleeping tablets can be addictive and may result to further and added difficulties. But if the sick person is already taking prescription antidepressants, you have to check with your physician if any of these alternative treatments will be good for your case.

Since stress assists trigger depression, you better similarly learn to manage stress effectively and avoid taking illegal drugs or those that were not prescribed by your doctor to refrain from substance abuse.

In a good deal of cases, supportive care that involves counseling sessions with your doctor is similarly as helpful as prescription antidepressants. It would likewise assist a lot if you get aid from family as well as from other individuals having this disorder. Other treatment being considered is the combination of behavioral, cognitive and interpersonal therapy.

You see, I thought it was my problem and that I would deal with it in my own way. But that didnt work out the way I planned. Because, I noticed I was angry all of the time. I was short with my children and I also was short with my wife also.

I tried treating my depression with "natural alternatives". I tried to get my serotonin levels, higher naturally, because that would pull me out of the depression. But again, things did not work out that way.

So I gave in and went to the doctor. I told them my difficulties and they put me on a drug for anxiety and depression since they both fine-looking much go hand-in-hand.

Men may experience a loss of sexual drive and this only adds to their sensations of worthlessness. They see this as a failure and an indication of their manhood. This could not be any farther from the truth. It is a medical condition that is caused from their depression.

Depression is a medical condition that needs to be treated. It is not a sign of weakness and must not be regarded a womans disease.

What causes depression is a lack of balance or state of disequilibrium of serotonin, a hormone, in the brain. It has been linked as a major contributor and a cause for somebody deciding to kill themselves.

The number of persons who are downhearted and die from suicide is roughly fifth-teen percent. Men are four times as likely as women to die from an attempted self-killing, altho women try it more often times but with failure. The elderly have the highest rate of successful suicides with sixty four dieing from suicide for everybody hundred thousand who die in general. The amounts of recorded suicides in the world have been steadily increasing for years now, along with the quantity of persons diagnosed with depression.

Whether or not you or an individual you acknowledge is suicidal you better seek professional assist for them. If what the age or gender, its not a healthful train of thought in the least. Whether or not see it as an undertake for attention and that they wont try. - 30535

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Be sure to check out some of the other work from this author. His latest articles includes topics ranging from commit lozenges to other quit smoking now topics.

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Your Question How To Get My Wife To Love Me Again Your Answer Here

Its a tough one youve been asking yourself for a while now. . . "How to get my wife to love me again?"
There are many avenues that need to be explored when coming up with an answer to your question and of course the answers depend on your specific situation and circumstances. But there are some basic strategies that any man can apply towards gaining his wifes love back.
First, you need to figure out why your wife has stopped loving you (or why she says that she doesnt love you anymore, even if that may not be true).
What are some common reasons for this?
Reason Number 1:
Ive lost my wifes love because I had an affair and she found out.
Reason Number 2:
My wife found someone new that she feels is better than me.
Reason Number 3:
I havent stuck to my promises and agreements. I promised her that I would change my attitude or some of the things that annoy her but I havent done so. This has lead to disappointment and loss of hope on her part.
Reason Number 4:
I neglected my wife in her eyes. I didnt give her the love and attention she needed.
Reason Number 5: I tried to control everything she did. I didnt allow my wife enough freedom and space to do what she wanted.
Once youve identified the reason or combination of reasons, you can start to go to work on the problem. Many marriages that fail do so because the real problems arent really understood. Communication is a huge part of making the marriage work - and men think differently than women so even if you think you know how your wife feels about something (because thats the way you feel), chances are you probably dont. So talk to her.
Without the right communication, its really hard to resolve and kind of conflict, big or small. The right kind of communication will allow your damaged relationship to start recuperating and later to thrive if you give your wife the opportunity to share her dreams, concerns, hopes and desires with you.
If your wife has conceded to trying in the marriage again, dont just go back to what wasnt working. Keep things interesting, do little things to show your wife how much you love and appreciate her or do something pleasantly surprising.
Keeping your promises is another important part of the equation. If you havent kept your promises in the past, start doing so now. Your past broken promises have no doubt ruined the trust in your relationship but you can start repairing that now.
Finally, give your wife the space and time she needs. Let her know that you are there for her but dont smother her.
Hopefully the above information is enough to get you started working on your solving your big concern of "How to get my wife to love me again".
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Need Some Tips On Making Up With My Boyfriend

When making up with my boyfriend I tried to remember these tips that my older and wiser friend had given me. 

Myself and my ex got back together so I hope they work for you too.

1) Men dont like chit chat: Generally speaking men don’t like to talk in depth about their feelings and  forcing the issue will just cause them to clam up even more. So when you are trying to get back together, don’t force him to analyze what went wrong. If he behaved badly but is willing to apologize, accept it and move on. 

2) Men can only concentrate on one thing at a time.  This is really true so don’t try and fight it. Very few  men can multitask and it is their genetics that are to blame so shouting at him is pointless.  The sooner  you accept that your man cannot listen to you while reading his newspaper or watching TV the better. Most of the time, he is not ignoring you on purpose. The more you try to understand that this is the way he is programmed the less arguments you will have.

3) Men like toys. The joke is that men never grow up and show it by still playing with toys.  Most men love to build things and start DIY jobs. Not all of them like to finish these jobs which can cause problems at home. Let your man indulge his hobbies, within reason. You can spend time with your girlfriends while he is fishing or building a boat. By compromising like this, he will probably be much more willing to spend time with you doing things together that you both enjoy.

4) Don’t assume that your man knows that you want to make up with him. Men in general tend to be a bit slow in picking up signals especially about relationships. For this reason, you sometimes need to be very direct  and tell them exactly how you feel. Men dont like games unless they understand the rules like in Golf or Chess. Us women change the rules on dating more often than men change their shirts so we need to give them a break if they get a little confused. 

5) Have you heard the joke - "Why does it take loads of sperm to fertilize one egg?  Because they refuse to  stop for directions!"  I know the men in my life would prefer to get lost, than admit defeat and stop to ask for directions.  Generally men find it very hard to admit they are wrong. If you question what they say, they can believe you are implying they have done something wrong.  This can cause problems in modern relationships as women are so used to being the boss at work and giving others directions. 

I am not suggesting that women have to become door mats or defer to their partners. But a little understanding of genetics goes a long way to help resolve the question of making up with my boyfriend.
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Can I Get My Ex To Love Me Again Yes I Can

So youre now single or with someone new. . .but you cant get your ex out of your mind. Youre always thinking "How can I get my ex to love me again. . ." And then you probably push the thought away because it seems impossible. The good news is that you can get your ex back in your arms. It has been done before, and not infrequently, and it can be done again, by you.

Men and women get out of relationships for different reasons, many of which are not understood by the opposite sex because mens and womens brains are wired differently. This makes things even more confusing. Some situations seem to be pretty straight-forward but most arent.

So before we tackle your goal of getting your ex back, lets take a look at why he or she isnt around in the first place.

Why do men leave relationships? Its pretty simple, really. They leave when they arent getting what they need. And one sure thing that they need is admiration and respect. It might be for that reason that they they left . . .and maybe they found it somewhere else. One of the most common reasons men give for leaving their wife or girlfriend is “No matter what I did, I couldn’t make her happy!”

Why do women leave relationships? They leave because they feel unappreciated and/or they leave because they are bored. What do you commonly hear from unhappy women? “He doesn’t appreciate a thing I do!”
Now, you might think that your exs reasons for leaving dont fit into one of those categories. You may be thinking, "my husband left me because I cheated on him." But why did you cheat on him in the first place? It probably has something to do with the fact that you werent getting the attention and appreciation you needed. Or maybe youre thinking. . .although thats not an excuse. Or maybe youre thinking "My girlfriend left me because I was never around." But ask yourself, why were you never around?

Now that youre not in continuous contact with your ex, you can take time to look at things more objectively. Use this time constructively to list all the positive and negative factors in your relationship. In the meantime, make sure you take care of yourself, eat healthy foods and exercise when possible.

Then, after youve had time to concentrate on yourself and look at your relationship with more objective eyes, you can think about making that first contact with your ex. Ask him or her out for coffee in a nonchalant manner. If he or she says yes, go out, talk about light non-threatening subjects and keep it short. At the end of the date, dont re-schedule another unless your ex suggests it. So, in answer to your question "Can I get my ex to love me again?" Yes, you can!

The date may go well, the date may go ok or the date may go terribly. In the last case, youll need to re-evaluate your situation and see if you want to continue trying later on or if you need to think about moving on.
But if the date goes well, you will see how the answer to "Can I Get My Ex to Love Me Again?" is "Yes, I can!"
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Get an ex back using reverse psychology

I was reviewing statistics for the main site today, and was surprised to find that the most popular article is How can I use reverse psychology to get my girlfriend back?

I never would have expected that, and it makes me wonder whether it would still be true if the title referred to getting an ex boyfriend back.

I mean, is it a "guy" thing? Do guys want to psych their girlfriends out, more than women do?

I guess I could find out by publishing an article called "How can I use reverse psychology to get my boyfriend back?" -- but it wouldnt add much value to the site. The information in the article thats already there applies to boyfriends just as much as it applies to girlfriends.

And the searches that drive readers to the article arent always about getting back an ex.

Sometimes its "My girlfriend uses reverse psychology on me and I dont want her to."

Sometimes its about using reverse psychology on women, in general. Like, how to use reverse psychology to get a girl, or on a wife.

It bothers me some, that there are so many queries amounting to "how can I trick her into doing what I want." I wish people understood that trickery doesnt build healthy relationships.

But at the same time, I understand that when youre desperate to get your ex back, you want to use any tool at hand.

Food for thought, I guess.
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Still In Love With My Ex Girlfriend How To Get Her Back

Many men tell me Im still in love with my ex girlfriend. They want to know if theres anything they can do to get her back. The very first question to ask men who think they want their ex back is to ask what theyve already tried.

A man who is serious about getting his ex girlfriend back will usually say hes repeatedly tried to tell her how much he loves her and needs her. Hes reassured her that hell change and the relationship will be different if she gives him a second chance.  This kind of begging and pleading simply shows a woman that youre desperate and often drives them even further away.

Some men will try the opposite tactic to pleading and theyll turn to bribery. Buying her expensive gifts or taking her to fancy restaurants in an attempt to impress her wont work either. She may accept your tokens, but bribery isnt the way to win back love.

The vast majority of women want to be in a relationship with a man who will listen to what she has to say. Even if shes just making small talk, its important to her that shes heard. This doesnt mean you have to agree with everything she says. You just need to listen.

When asked if theyre willing to listen to their ex girlfriends, men who are trying hard to get back their ex often say Ive tried to listen, but she doesnt listen to a word I say. Sometimes when men think theyre listening, what theyre really doing is hearing the problem and then immediately talking back to offer a solution to fix whatever problem his girlfriend is having. He believes because she doesnt hear a word he says that shes not listening.

However, only hearing the parts of the conversation you think you can help her with and then trying to make her listen to you first is not the same as YOU listening to your girlfriends needs. Women appreciate men who listen to them. Unfortunately, men communicate in slightly different ways, which could probably have been a contributing factor to your break up in the first place.

If youre still thinking Im still in love with my ex-girlfriend and want to get her back, then practice listening. Ask her a question and then listen to what she says intently. Make a comment about her response or ask another question relating to her response, but dont try to fix it or dismiss it as unimportant. Simply listen to her.

Women assume that a man who listens to her really cares. It tells you that you understand and that youre really interested. The next time you receive an opportunity to get together with your ex, take some time to establish eye contact and really listen intently to what she says.

At first, you might find your ex-girlfriend is a little confused or guarded about your sudden change, but when she realizes that you are interested in what shes saying shell begin to relax and realize that you do care. Shell immediately begin wondering why her feelings for you went away and they should come rushing back when she understands that you really do still love your ex and really do want to get your ex back.
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How To Win Ex Girlfriend Back With An Apology

No doubt all you can think about now shes walked out on you is how to win ex girlfriend back.  Possibly you didnt realize that you loved her, or perhaps how much you loved her, until she walked out on you and now youre in pain and desperate to figure out how to win ex girlfriend back. You will be able to get your ex back.

Well heres some information that will help you as you try to figure out the right moves that will help you get her back in your arms.

You might have made some mistakes, weve all been there, so dont beat yourself up!  The most constructive thing to do right now is not to try and rewrite history, instead you need to figure out how to step up and find a way to write the future for the two of you, that you want. 

If you need to apologize for anything that you did wrong, then get ready to do so.  What you should also do, is to make sure that you understand why youre apologizing.  Dont just go through the motions of an apology because you think its what she wants to hear.  No, look at the behavior that shes objecting to and try and understand her point of view.

The apology that you now come up with has to address two points if youre serious about figuring out how to win ex girlfriend back.  Make sure that you use the apology to convince your ex girlfriend that you have completely understood her point of view and also that youre one hundred percent ready to change that behavior.

It will be great if you have previously come up with a plan to prove to your ex that youre rally serious.  By that I mean do you need to go and talk to a professional about your behavior?  Well then make the appointment and make sure that you have actually attended a few sessions and are committed to continuing to talking to the professional.  Just a word of warning, if youre not sincere in this, youre wasting your time even trying to fool your ex girlfriend.

If you cheated on her, then try and figure out why you cheated.  Again, you cant rewrite history, but if you can begin to figure out what brought you to the point of cheating, then the next time you find yourself in that situation you will have a real shot at avoiding it.  Explain your thought process to your ex girlfriend and own your behavior.

When you go to talk to your girlfriend, as you attempt to answer your question how to win back ex girlfriend, make sure you give her space to say what she has to say and listen with sincerity.  Do all of the above and youre well on your way to getting her back.
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I Want My Wife To Love Me Again

Are you unable to think about anything except "I want my wife to love me again"? Has your marriage gone by the wayside and you dont know why or what to do about it? Here are some tips that can help you out.
If you dont know why your wife has stopped loving you (or so she says), then thats the first thing you need to figure out. First of all, if your wife is still with you, then she probably does still love you. If she didnt, she would be somewhere else. So thats something positive you want to keep in mind. So why is she saying that she doesnt love you or just acting like she doesnt love you?
The main reason that a woman will feel like shes fallen out of love is because she isnt getting the attention and appreciation that she craves. Women are multi-faceted and do many things for you and your family. They work, take care of the kids, do all the household duties, have a social life that includes other friends and families and other interests that you both may not share.
So, ask yourself, do you appreciate everything your wife does for you? Do you apprecitate that she is her own person and has her own ideas and interests, not all of which will be the same as yours. Do you appreciate all the little things she does to show you she cares? If so, then you need to let her know if you havent already.
On the other hand, there is such a thing as overdoing it. You dont want to be fawning all over your wife and constantly asking her whats wrong and how you can help her or make her feel more loved. If youve been doing that and its just making her push you away even more, then its time to stop. Dont be negative or hostile about it. continue to be positive and cheerful.
But just give her space. Focus on taking care of yourself. Make sure youre eating right, exercising and going out with friends. Take the kids out on your own and leave your wife some time to herself. You can still offer comments up like "Boy, you sure do look nice today" but leave it at that. Then walk out the door and go to work.
Once you step back a bit and give your wife some space, as well as focus on yourself and show her that you are not going to dye without her, she will start to see you as someone that is to be admired and appreciated as well. Take it slow and let her make the first move towards you again. Hopefully this has helped you take some of the mystery and pain out of the statement "I want my wife to love me again."
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How To Really Love Your Spouse

By Carol Ann

How do I love thee let me count the ways? Well, ask yourself honestly are you doing enough to love your spouse? The answer is probably not. Life is busy, even chaotic at times and it is very easy to get wrapped up in the everyday happenings of life. It is easy to take your spouse and their love for you for granted. But this can be the source of many marriages becoming dull and played out.

In order to have a marriage that truly is "till death do you part" you must invest in your relationship. You can accomplish this by doing whatever it takes to make it successful. This could mean taking a day off to spend with them, or planning a surprise getaway weekend where you spend the day together in bed. You can also do little, simple things such as leaving a note in their car or lunch or planning a romantic meal and having it waiting when they come home from a tough day.

Finding special ways to make your spouse realize how important they are is one of the most important things that you can do to keep your marriage on track. Letting them know that they are the most important thing in the world to you, is one of the keys to a happy and successful marriage.

A marriage requires nurturing in order to grow. If you show your love for one another and make your marriage the top priority on your life, then you will have the tools you need to overcome any problems that try to creep into your marriage. With a nurtured marriage you will be able to face problem head on and overcome them as a team, before they get a chance to destroy all that you have worked for with your spouse.

Marriage is more than a partnership it is romance that must go on and on. Treating your spouse as a lover and a best friend is the key to making your marriage the most meaningful relationship in your life. People will envy the love that you share if you take a little time out each day to devote to showing your spouse how much you love and care about them. It is truly amazing how just a few little ounces of effort a day can add up to a lifetime of happiness. - 30535

About the Author:

If you are experiencing marital problems, check out www.lightyourfire.com immediately. We will help you avoid divorce, and and remove the need for you to look up save my marriage on the internet.

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