Being extra nice and polite is the first thing you have to do. That sounds ridiculously simple, doesn’t it? But when we’re with someone for a while, we tend to take them for granted. And if right now you’re saying, “I want my wife back” then this applies to you.
No matter what happens, you need to be on an even keel, nice and polite. Unfortunately, it’s easier to be nice and polite when you’re still together because you see her more often. But it is possible to run into someone often “accidentally on-purpose,” especially if you live in a small town or are part of a close-knit community.
Run into her often and use every moment you’re near her as an opportunity to show her that you can be considerate and polite. The important thing is to avoid things like getting angry or impatient with her.
Sometimes this is a difficult thing to judge. You might think your wife wants you to be jealous. Or you might think the whole breakup is a ploy to get you to act differently. If you keep thinking of the breakup along those terms, you’re in for a disappointment.
Sometimes people do break up with someone to prove a point and to get their lover to come around to their way of thinking. But most often it’s not a game, and the person left because they were unhappy with you and the relationship.
If you’re saying, “I want my wife back!” and you’re trying to convince yourself that she didn’t really intend to leave you, but instead meant get a rise out of you, stop thinking that way now.
You simply shouldn’t presume to know something that could be completely wrong. So assume that she had reasons that were good enough for her. And show her that there’s more to you than meets the eye.
So from being nice and polite, we move into being thoughtful. They are different things, though they’re overlapping, too. Being nice and polite can apply to everyday situations. Being thoughtful means going that extra mile.
Try sending her a card telling her she’s special. Send it for no real reason, no occasion, except to remind her that you think she’s special. Surprise her in a way you probably rarely did when you were together, and reap the rewards.
Finally, be thoughtful enough to leave her alone. You might think, “I want my wife back,” but if she’s not ready to try and you keep hounding her on the issue, you’ll only drive her further away.
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