How to get rid of an ex girlfriend

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The psychotic signs


There is evidence that some women are more susceptible to destructive behavior than others. The goal is to spot these gals before things get out of control, and know how to handle a potentially dangerous situation.

Shes irrationally jealous
A little jealousy can be healthy for the relationship, but when it becomes irrational and leads your lovebird to start testing you or checking up on you every hour on the hour when youre apart, you might have a potential stalker on your hands.

Be wary of women who call a few times late at night or even in the early hours of the morning. Some women even go as low as getting one of their girlfriends to seduce you in order to test your loyalty and see if youll bite.

She commits embarrassing public displays
If she likes to scream and scold you loudly and in public, then shes showing early signs of an individual who likes to have control at all costs -- including embarrassment -- to achieve her goals.

Shes emotionally unstable
If you cant tell the difference between her being happy, mad or sad by looking at her facial expressions, then you might have a problem.

Sure women are known to be emotional, but that doesnt mean that she has to cry every five minutes when she doesnt get what she wants. Be especially careful with those women who end their crocodile tears with loud, devilish laughter.

She controls your life
Your new favorite color is pink, apparently tofu tastes better than steak, figure skating has become more exciting than hockey, and now you absolutely cringe when looking at beautiful women with big breasts.

Be cautious of women who like to impose their likes and dislikes upon men -- especially those who say, "I know you dont like it honey, but trust me, what Im doing will be good for the relationship. Youll thank me one day."

She needs constant attention
She cannot spend a moment without speaking to you, or calls your portable phone, your home, pages you, then calls your portable, your home, and then back to your portable, your home, and leaves the following message: "I know youre home, pick up the phone." Then calls your portable phone, your home, pages you, then calls your portable... you get the point.

She makes paranoid assumptions
If you cant come home late from work (Im talking 5 minutes late here) without her asking to smell your penis, or if you happen to look at another woman, and she asks, "So would you f*ck her? Huh? Would you f*ck her, you bastard?", then you might be in bigger trouble than you think.

Caution, if that devilish voice of hers makes it back into the conversation, you might want to keep your mouth shut for your own safety -- especially if she starts laughing like that guy in Michael Jacksons "Thriller."

Shes a habitual liar
At first, it was funny that she never really had a little dog named Fido. The white lie she told you about never getting your mothers dinner invitation was harmless. The fib she told you about being a dance instructor was strange. The lie she told you about not following you to work was scary. Do you see a pattern here?

Handling the situation

Someone in a normal situation will just end the relationship, but in this particular predicament, you have to take careful steps so that you dont make the situation worse. What usually drives her to act in such an irrational way is her certainty that you are the best person for her and she must keep you at all costs.

Here are some of the steps you might consider in order to prevent her from becoming a psycho-girlfriend after a breakup:

Dont treat her badly
If youre mean to her, shell stick to you like a moth to a flame. Remember, the fact that youre even more unattainable makes her attraction all the more fatal. Be nice; those are the guys that usually finish last, and thats where you want to be on her list.

Become crazier
If she begins to believe that youre not her soul mate, or that youre the psycho, then she might consider moving on.

Do a background check
In extreme cases, you should consider snooping into her past. Ask her friends and family about her past relationships, or try speaking to her ex-boyfriends. And yes, it is definitely a bad sign if there are no traces of any of her past lovers.

Cover your back
Before actually going through with the breakup, make sure you have all your angles covered. You dont want to do anything that will make her resentful towards you and eventually seek revenge on you or your future lover.

Be aware
She might begin following or spying on you to see if youre with another woman. I recommend that you hold off on bringing another woman into your life until youre sure that the Firecracker is completely out of the way.

Keep records and reports with authorities
If she begins to stalk you or make threats, report it to the police right away. You need to have a history of complaints in order to cover your back if and when she decides to make false accusations against you. Keeping records and opening a file on your particular case will also help with the restraining order -- if needed, of course.

Get a restraining order
If you find that you cannot lead a normal life without constantly watching your back out of fear of Firecracker retaliation, then maybe it is time to take legal action.

Move away
A restraining order serves as a wakeup call, letting the Firecracker know that youre serious about no longer wanting to see her.

However, it only works on people who are willing to follow it; it doesnt necessarily mean that youre out of danger. If you feel that shes still an explosive hazard, then move to another city without leaving a trace.

Its not normal

If you feel like youre walking on eggshells or cant communicate with her without suffering her wrath every single time -- especially if you feel stressed, scared or nauseous -- then chances are youre dating a Firecracker.

Dating and being in love should be fun. Although not always a walk in the park, it should not result in the suffocation of a persons freedoms. If you feel that you have no rights or no say in the relationship, then maybe its time to end the relationship in its early stages before things really get out of hand.

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