First of all, don’t go out and chase them. They probably need some space. In fact, often they will come to regret their decision if they aren’t pressured.
That means that you shouldn’t call, text or email them for a week or so. Whatever you do, don’t go begging them to come back. Don’t send flowers or love notes. Instead, hang back and chill.
After a week or so, if your love hasn’t made any contact, it is now okay to do it yourself. But be casual about it. Drop them an email saying “how are you doing?” Again, don’t overdo it. You don’t want to seem too eager.
Just as there is power in romantic relationships, there is a power balance in a break up situation. If you give up your power by chasing your ex, you actually lessen your chances of getting them back.
If the situation was a minor blow up, you may be able to win and get your ex back by stepping back for a few days and then dropping a casual hint that you are still interested.
But, if a month or so has gone by and you’re still not back together, it’s time to step things up. By this time, he or she has probably started thinking about new partners. Now, it’s time to really learn how to win your ex back.
It is very important not to crowd your ex, even when you are pursuing them. Don’t stalk. It is okay to show up where they hang out from time to time, but be prepared to pay attention to other people besides your ex.
You should also consider contacting your ex from time to time in a casual way. For instance, you could email them saying “I walked by the park where we flew kites that time and it made me think of you. I miss those days.” Also, make sure that you always remember their birthday with a card or small gift. This will let them know that they are still on your radar.
One controversial tactic is to ask one of your ex’s friends out on a date. Then text your ex and ask him or her where the friend would like to go on the date. This will make your ex think that you are moving on and make him or her question whether they really want to be broken up.
It is okay to date other people while you are broken up, but you should refrain from sleeping with them. Your ex may consider this a final sign that the relationship is over. So, be true to your love even though you have broken up.
And that is how to win and get your ex back.
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